His Fool
by TastyAsItGets
Summary: There was one reason why Bellatrix hated Sirius so much: he was a pompous jerk. It also happened to be the reason why she was insanely attracted to him.
1. Revenge

**HIS FOOL**

by TastyAsItGets

* * *

**) Prologue (**

I've been called crazy.

Before my untimely demise, I, Bellatrix Lestrange, was the most feared witch in the world. Seemingly at random, I would torture and kill. I caused pain just for my pleasure.

What people never knew was that there was a method to my so-called madness. Oh yes, I certainly enjoyed the "despicable" acts I performed, but I did them for a reason:

They all—every sick, pathetic one of those whom I've hurt—deserved every drop of pain I gave them.

Every. Single. One.

Especially my cousin, Sirius Black.

* * *

**) Chapter One - Revenge (**

"Bella? There you are!"

Bellatrix Black's head snapped around to see who had called her name. She rolled her eyes in irritation when she saw who it was: her goody-two-shoes younger sister, Andromeda. She had just entered the library of their parents' mansion where Bella had been reading.

"What?" Bella snapped, throwing the thick book onto the pile next to her. She always liked to get a head-start on her readings before school started, and since it was beginning in only three days, she was reading as fast as she could. It allowed her to focus her attentions on _other _things at school, more important things than the simple, safe spellwork taught at Hogwarts.

"Mother's looking for you," Andromeda replied in a voice that showed her disapproval of Bella's attitude. She was _always_ doing that—disapproving of anything Bella did. It was rather grating on the nerves.

"Where is she?"

"In your bedroom."

Bella's stomach dropped. What was Mother doing in there? Bella had already packed for the journey to Grimmauld Place, so what was wrong?

She glared at her brown-haired sister, but stood up and said, "Don't touch my stuff."

Andromeda rolled her eyes. "As if I wanted to."

Bella brushed past her, leaving the expansive library behind her. She wandered through her parent's large mansion, went up a large flight of stairs, and entered her own bedroom. Her tall, raven-haired mother, Druella, was standing in front of the window on the opposite side of the room from the door, looking out over the mansion grounds.

"Mother?" Bella asked, walking in. "Andra told me you wanted to see me."

It was a foreign feeling, having her mother in her bedroom. Druella hadn't been in there since before Bella had started school at Hogwarts six years before.

Druella turned around. "Yes, dear. Come in."

_Dear? _Bella thought incredulously. _She must have something up her sleeve! She _never_ calls me dear._

She only ever called Andromeda "dear." She was the special daughter in the family. Seventeen-year-old Bellatrix, as the oldest, could do no right in her mother's eyes, while Andromeda, fifteen years old, could do no wrong. Their youngest sister Narcissa, thirteen years old, was often ignored by her parents and had been taken under Bella's wing.

Bella hesitantly entered her own bedroom and sat on the bed as Druella indicated. "What is it?"

"Bellatrix, I have something to talk to you about," Druella said, almost amiably. "It's about your former _cousin_."

_Ah, _Bella thought. _Him._ She had been surprised that Druella hadn't brought him up before.

"You know who I am referring to, of course," Druella continued.

"Of course. Sirius."

Druella whipped her head around to look at her and said harshly, "For your own sake, don't _ever_ mention His name again in this house again. And _especially_ not in front of your aunt and uncle tomorrow!"

"I know better than that!" Bella said indignantly. "If I mention Him, Aunt Walburga will start crying and Uncle Orion will start screaming! That ruckus is more than enough to shut even _my_ gaping mouth." Bella was often criticized for her sharp tongue.

Druella relaxed a notch. "Good. The reason I bring Him up is because the term is starting, and unless He has _completely _lost all of his faculties and quit school—which wouldn't surprise me in the least—you will see Him there."

"And…?"

"And I must make it extremely clear that you are to have nothing to do with Him."

"But I thought Orion and Walburga are still trying to make Him come home," Bella said. "What harm is there—"

"He has rejected their final offer," Druella said. "And from this moment forward, His name is never to be mentioned by any self-respecting Black."

So, Sirius's parents had been trying to get him to come back home and were soundly rejected. That wound on their pride must have hurt a great deal, considering he was giving up his Black family for the Mudblood-loving Potters, with whom he had been staying all summer.

"It matters little to me whether I can talk to Him or not," Bella said indifferently. "He and I have never kept company at school since we are in different Houses."

She wasn't saying that for Druella's sake; it was true. Sirius and Bella had interacted only at family functions, and only because they were the same age and there was nothing better to do.

"You don't seem upset that your betrothal has been cancelled, then," Druella said. "Good. Had Siri—_He_ turned out better, He would have been a fine match, but under the circumstances it is impossible…"

Bella blinked in surprise. "Honestly, I had completely forgotten about that! Trust me, Mother, I don't shed any tears over the loss of my dear _ex-_cousin as a husband." She and Sirius had been unofficially intended for each other since they were born; the Blacks loved to intermarry in order to keep the bloodline pure.

Druella studied her daughter sharply. "I hope this doesn't mean that you have forgotten your obligation to marry a pure-blood, has it?"

"Of course not!" Bella replied quickly, bushing back her long, black hair from her face. "It just didn't occur to me that a result of His rebellion was that our marriage was cancelled, that's all, but it's a nice bonus. He and I were never overly-excited about the match, and that is putting it mildly."

Before Hogwarts, Sirius and Bella had been playmates and got along amiably, but as soon as they had been sorted into separate Houses, (she into Slytherin, he into Gryffindor), their closeness had waned to the point where they no longer spoke.

Druella stood up. "It appears that we understand each other. You are never to speak to Him again, and you must make sure your sisters do not as well. I have already spoken to them."

"I understand completely, Mother. I have no desire to speak to Him _whatsoever_."

"Excellent," Druella said, a small, rare look of approval showing on her hard-but-beautiful face for a moment. She walked to the door and said as she went, "We are flooing to Grimmauld Place after breakfast tomorrow, so be sure you're ready with all of your things."

* * *

Grimmauld Place epitomized the spirit of the Black family. Though it was elegant, it was dark even in the daytime, and had a certain smell of history and superiority. The walls were lined with family pictures, people who had done great things for the wizarding world over the ages. Bella felt a certain unexplainable bond with the building, and was one of the few people that knew every room by heart.

It was always the first stop Bella's family made on the way to Platform Nine and Three-Quarters. In years past, Bella's family would come a week or so before school to shop in Diagon Alley, but with the tension at Grimmauld Place since Sirius had run away, they had decided not to impose upon them this year and opted to only stay one night before the girls and their cousin Regulus left on the Hogwarts Express.

After stepping out of the large, grand fireplace in the living room behind her daughters, Druella greeted her sister-in-law, Walburga.

"Druella!" Walburga said, holding out her cheek for Druella to kiss. "Where is my brother?"

"He's off on work," Druella said, waving her hand airily to indicate that she couldn't care less that her husband was away on business—as usual. "It's just me and the girls this year."

_That's what she says every year, _Bella thought.

She wasn't bitter about her father's absence from her life, because that's how most of the fathers that she knew were. The thing that annoyed her was the way her mother, like most wives, was in denial about how uninvolved her husband was. Why hide the truth when everyone knew it?

Bella, Andromeda, and Narcissa were standing in the living room, awkwardly clutching their large suitcases in their hands as they watched their mother talk.

Narcissa's pretty, pale face was turning red from the effort, so Bella said, "Mother? May we bring our suitcases upstairs?"

Truthfully, she wasn't intending to drag her suitcase up two flights of stairs; it was her subtle hint to her Aunt Walburga to call the house-elf to carry their things up. Druella stopped her conversation with her sister-in-law to glare at her eldest daughter, but Walburga caught the hint fast enough that Druella couldn't berate her.

"_Kreacher_!" Walburga hollered.

A hideous house-elf came stumbling into the room and bowed. "Yes, Mistress?"

"Bring the suitcases upstairs to the guest rooms," Walburga said, not even looking over at Kreacher. "Then fix us a brunch."

Kreacher bowed low again, saying reverently, "Anything for the Mistress."

"Then stop groveling and get to it!" Walburga barked.

As Kreacher took their suitcases away, Bella smirked at the foolish elf. He was, perhaps, the most pathetic one she had seen in her life, and that was saying something, because all house-elves were pathetic and worthless. Kreacher lived to serve his family. Even though they abused him, he seemed to enjoy it.

When Kreacher had left, somehow dragging all three suitcases upstairs, Druella asked, "Now, where's my dear nephew Regulus?"

"Oh, he's off with some of his friends, enjoying the last day of the holidays. He'll be back later," Walburga said. "Now, how 'bout we go into the dining room and have some tea and catch up before you all go off again?"

A little bit later they were all seated around one end of the long, skinny dining room table, snacking on crackers and sipping on tea. Kreacher was stumbling around in the background, refilling their drinks and bringing out more food. They all ignored the house-elf—all except for Narcissa, who stared at him with wide, blue eyes over her cup of milk.

"And then some fool at the Ministry proposed—get this—that maybe it _would_ be appropriate to give rights to house-elves!" Walburga was saying. She always knew the latest gossip from the Ministry of Magic, what with living in London.

"No!" Druella exclaimed, putting her hand on her heart. "That's the most absurd thing I have ever heard! It's not like they have _feelings_."

Bella smirked, agreeing with her mother and aunt. _Those things, have rights? The right to what? Lick the bottom of their master's shoe twice instead of once?_

Just then, the door flung open and Regulus came running in, his face tan and black hair messy. He was one year younger than Sirius and Bella, and had an easy-going expression on his face.

"Regulus!" Walburga said. "So glad you could join us!"

Bella noted how especially nice she was being to him.

_She's probably deathly afraid of losing another son, _she figured.

"Would you like some food?" Walburga continued.

"No thanks, Mum," Regulus replied. "I just came to see if the girls want to come upstairs and play a game or something. A couple of my mates just went up there and are picking one out."

"Sounds excellent," Bella said. "May we be excused, Mother?"

As much as she was interested in hearing the latest news from the Ministry, she was more interested in catching up with some of the Slytherin boys from Hogwarts.

Druella nodded, and her three daughters stood up and followed Regulus out of the room.

As they rushed up the flights of stairs, Regulus said, "Golly, it's good to see you all! This place has been positively stuffy with all of the drama with—you know who."

Bella was interested to see what Regulus thought of it all and asked him.

"Eh!" he replied. "I think Mum and Dad are taking it a bit too hard, but—_He_—said some bloody terrible things to them. They had an awful row before He left. All summer there have been owls back and forth between us and the Potter's place—a couple of howlers too!—but nothing's been resolved. They all just keep getting angrier and angrier, and now Sir—I mean, _He_—can't even come back if he wants to! They've disinherited Him, and it's as if He never existed now!"

They entered the family room on the second floor. There were five other Slytherin boys there, four of whom were in Regulus' year (sixth), and another, Rodolphus Lestrange, who was in Bella's year (seventh). Lestrange was a very handsome young man with a very large ego. All of the Slytherin girls fawned over him, and Bella had made a point not to join their crowd, so she merely nodded at him as she did with the other boys when she, Regulus, and her sisters came in.

"You're talking about Him, aren't you?" Lestrange asked snidely, catching the last of their conversation.

"Yes," Regulus sighed, "but enough about—"

"Nasty git, that one," Lestrange scoffed. "Never liked him. Gryffindors never turn out right."

"I don't know about that—" Andromeda started, but was cut off.

"True that!" another boy added. Everyone called him by his last name, Avery, and Bella didn't even know his first name; she never cared nor bothered to ask. "All those blasted Gryffindors think they are the best people in the world and that everyone should worship them."

"But—" Andromeda started.

"Shut up, Andra!" Bella snapped, annoyed and embarrassed that her sister might be thinking of defending their enemy House.

"But not all Gryffindors are evil, just like not all Slytherins are—" Andromeda said.

"Are what?" Lestrange asked suspiciously, and the rest of group leaned in to hear what she was going to say.

Andromeda suddenly looked scared. "Are—are purebloods."

Silence followed.

Bella's face was red. "Don't listen to Andromeda. She's too young to know what's she's talking about."

"But Severus is—"

"_Shut_ _up_, _Andra_!"

Andromeda jumped and bit her lip, cheeks flaming.

"Wow, I can see that even though Andromeda may be soft on Gryffindors, Bella here sure isn't!" Regulus laughed uncertainly.

"Eh, she's right," Avery said. "James Potter is the most pompous bloke I ever laid eyes on."

Regulus flinched at the mention of Potter, and his face hardened. "He's the nastiest piece of work I've ever met. I don't care if he's pure-blood, he's a traitor, and turned my brother into one too!"

Lestrange's face melted from an angry look to a conspiratorial one. "I think we should get back at those idiots. You know, show everyone that you can't betray your family like _He _did, or help someone to like Potter did, and not expect trouble."

Bella's thin mouth twisted into a smile. Scheming was her favorite thing to do.

"What did you have in mind?"


	2. Amnesia

**) Chapter Two - Amnesia (**

Thump…thump…thump.

A pounding in Bella's head slowly roused her from a deep sleep. She rolled over in her bed grouchily, trying to situate her head so it wouldn't hurt as much. When that didn't work, she flipped over again, groaning and rubbing her eyes.

From somewhere to her right, someone chuckled. She squinted against the harsh glare of the sun coming in from a place she couldn't pinpoint, trying to see who it was. The light made her head hurt more, but she was not about to close her eyes again without knowing who was laughing, especially since they seemed to be laughing at her.

She sat up, wiped her face again, and looked in the direction of the rumbling laughter that was getting louder. She saw a blurry, dark form that seemed to be lying on a bed next to hers. As her vision cleared, she saw that it was a boy: a very good-looking boy with shaggy, dark hair and grey eyes twinkling with mischief. He was propped up on his arm facing her, and his other arm was heavily bandaged right up to his shoulder and lying limp in front of him.

Bella recognized him instantly. She groaned again and flopped back down onto the bed, burying her face in the pillow.

"Happy to see me, Bella?"

"What do you want, Sirius?" she mumbled in annoyance, her words garbled by the pillow.

Sirius didn't reply, so she inclined her head slightly to see him. He was smirking, as usual.

She rolled her eyes. "Never mind."

"Wondering why you're in the hospital wing, aren't you?" he asked.

It was true; she had been wondering that since she opened her eyes. She had known as soon as her eyes focused that she was in Hogwarts' hospital wing. And she had no idea why…She had no memory of even arriving at Hogwarts. The last thing she could remember was being on the Hogwarts Express….

"Care to enlighten me?" she asked snippily.

A wide grin spread over his face. "Guess first."

"Go to hell."

He was toying with her, and she knew it. If it had been anyone else playing around with her, she would have been amused and gone along with it, but the fact that it was _Sirius_ changed everything. He didn't simply joke around with people—he mocked them.

"Fine," he said, leaning back to look at the ceiling.

He didn't say anything else, and that irked Bella more than anything. She was dying to know what had happened!

_He must have used a memory charm on me, _she figured. _That's why I can't remember anything. It's his idea of a joke. _

But why would she be in the hospital because of a simple memory charm? It didn't make sense.

Just then, Madame Pomfrey came in, balancing an over-flowing tray in each hand. "Here's your breakfasts, dears!"

Bella rolled over and sat up, eager to eat. She hadn't realized how hungry she was until she smelled the delicious rolls mixed with the scent of spicy sausage.

"How are you feeling, dearie?" Pomfrey asked Bella as she set the tray down on a stand across her lap.

"My head hurts something fierce," Bella replied.

"That's to be expected from a memory charm," the nurse nodded. "How's the bump on the back of your head?"

Bella reached to feel the back of her head. To her surprise, there _was_ a tender bump there.

"What happened to me?" she asked.

"I don't know all of the details, love, but the Headmaster will be down to talk with you both. Things were too busy yesterday for him to attend to the matter, what with the start-of-term feast and all, but he'll be here shortly."

Bella didn't know whether she should be happy or scared that he was coming over. What if she had done something terrible that she simply couldn't remember? The idea of doing something horrific wasn't what scared her, it was the worry that she couldn't remember _how _she'd done it. She glanced over at where Pomfrey was examining Sirius' arm and smirked. If she was the one who had messed it up, any punishment would be worth it.

After Pomfrey left, Bella chose to ignore Sirius as she ate. She saw him glance at her once in a while out of the corner of her eye, but she didn't give him the satisfaction of showing that she cared at all.

Gradually, the sound of faint voices could be heard from Madam Pomfrey's office. Bella stopped eating and looked over at Sirius. He looked back at her and winked, as if he knew what was happening.

She glared at him, set her tray and its stand on the bedside table, and hopped out of bed. She crept over to the nurse's office, staying close to the wall so that her figure wouldn't be spotted through the opaque window. She saw that the door was left open about an inch, through which she had been able to hear the voices.

"…But according to Lily Evans, who witnessed the fight from the hallway, Bellatrix Black attacked first," the voice of a woman was saying.

"Of course she would say that, Minerva! She's in the same house as James Potter and Sirius Black," replied a familiar male voice. "Nothing against those boys, because they are exceptionally talented, but they have a reputation for starting trouble, much more so than Bellatrix Black. One might even say that Bellatrix was defending herself."

Bella jumped when she felt something press against her side—it was Sirius' bandaged arm. He was pressed against the wall in the same manner that she was and listening in on the conversation. Bella scowled up at him and inched away, looking disgusted that any part of him had touched her.

"I certainly do not doubt the trouble-making ability of those two," McGonagall came back, "but there are witnesses that can verify that Bellatrix Black, Lestrange, and Avery purposely went over to the compartment that Potter, Sirius Black, Lupin, and Pettigrew were in, in order to pick a fight."

_So, it did happen on the Hogwarts Express, _Bella thought, but was disturbed when Sirius scooted over so that he was touching her again. She glared up at him, thoroughly disgusted by his childish behavior.

A small smile played on the edge of his lips, which broadened into a full smile when Bella muttered, "Prick."

"But what about Bellatrix Black's memory loss? She's been unconscious for almost a full day! Only a premeditated and planned-out spell could have been so forceful," Slughorn said.

"I offer no excuse for the use of the memory charm," McGonagall said. "That was inexcusable. But I think it would be appropriate for us to acknowledge that all of the students are in the wrong here, not just Potter and Sirius Black. After all, Black has a frost-bitten arm, Potter's eyes were bleeding for hours, and Dave Channing—who by all accounts was just an innocent bystander—will probably be unable to play Quidditch for the rest of the term because of his hand-twitching that even Poppy had no cure for!"

At the news of the havoc she, Avery, and Lestrange had apparently caused to her least favorite people, Bella grinned. Channing, while not necessarily as revolting as Potter or Sirius, was Gryffindor's Seeker, and the loss of him would mean a better chance for Slytherin.

"What did he say?" Sirius whispered, leaning in as if he was hard of hearing.

"You heard perfectly well," Bella said, distracted by his breath tickling her neck, and then quietly exclaimed, "Hey!"

Sirius had pivoted his body so that he was closer to the door. Since Bella was already in the spot that he seemed to want, he simply pressed his body against hers in order to get closer and yet remain out of sight.

Having Sirius's chin suddenly in her face was not a pleasant experience for her. She gripped his sides and tried to push him off, but he was much stronger than her and didn't budge.

"What are you doing?" she whispered furiously.

"Trying to hear," he replied innocently, seemingly unaware of how he was practically smashing his body against hers.

Bella's ears reddened beneath her black hair, and she knew that the humiliation of Sirius having her in such a position was not worth hearing what the teachers were saying. She had heard enough to get the general idea, anyway.

Since she couldn't move forward, she slipped to the side and away from him. His weight had been leaning forward into her, so when she deftly slid out, he stumbled forward and lightly hit his forehead against the wall. Pleased with how she handled herself, she went back to her bed and lay down in case the teachers came out.

_If I'm lucky, they'll catch Sirius, _she thought snidely. He deserved it. _What was he thinking, pinning me there? I hope he isn't hair-brained enough to think that I might be seduced as easily as a Gryffindor girl would! _

A minute later, Sirius came sprinting back and leapt onto his bed seconds before Slughorn, McGonagall, and Dumbledore rounded the corner and headed towards their beds.

Bella pretended to be just waking up. When they came over, she groggily sat up out of respect. Sirius had been lying with the back of his head resting in his hands, and he also sat up as if surprised that they were there.

"I'm glad to see you're awake," Dumbledore said, his piercing eyes hinting that he knew what they had been doing. "We have come to discuss what happened on the Hogwarts Express yesterday."

Bella was looking around the room, as if confused why she was there. "Why am I in the hospital?"

"Sirius here modified your memory yesterday," Slughorn said. "Potter was cursing you at the same time, and you were thrown back against the wall and knocked out."

Bella's eyes bulged as if she was shocked. "But why would they be cursing me? I mean, I know we aren't the best of friends…"

"Come off it, Bellatrix," Sirius interrupted. "You and your goons came in with your wands out."

"And apparently, you are the only one of your group to have been injured," McGonagall added. "Potter and Channing were also injured, as well as Sirius here."

"Channing?" Bella asked, as if she couldn't recall who that was right away.

Dumbledore was staring at her, and she decided to cut back on the fake-ignorance. It was better to go for the honest approach. After all, she couldn't remember doing anything, so would they really punish her for it?

"The reason we are here is because we need to make it absolutely clear that this sort of thing will not happen again," Dumbledore said. "Under no circumstances are you to attack another student, or even to pull out a wand—unless it is in self-defense."

"Yes, Headmaster," Bella said quickly with wide, understanding eyes.

Sirius nodded.

"We have decided that your punishment will be two weeks of detention," McGonagall said. "Professor Slughorn has agreed to let me administer detention for the both of you."

Bella was disappointed that Slughorn hadn't taken control of her detention himself. She was a part of the Slug Club, and if she had had detention with him, he would have been easy on her.

"Also, fifteen points have been taken away from your Houses for each offence," McGonagall added. "And even though you have missed your first day of classes, you will not be given any extensions or special treatment because you were in the hospital wing."

Bella's heart sank. _At least I read ahead this summer, _she consoled herself. She didn't want to waste time trying to catch up when she could be practicing more…interesting...spells with her like-minded Slytherins.

After lecturing the students a bit more, the professors left. Bella was itching to leave, but knew she shouldn't without Pomfrey's permission. She pretended to be asleep to avoid conversation with the pompous oaf on the bed next to hers until Pomfrey came to check on them.

After checking on Bella, she said, "You're free to go, honey. But mind your head!" She gave her a potion to help with the headache. As Bella was leaving, she heard Sirius protesting behind her, "But my arm is fine! Let me go too!"

As the door shut behind her, she grinned as she thought of all the juicy gossip she would have to share with the Slytherins as soon as she got down to the dungeons. Yes, she had detention, but nothing could dampen the thought that somehow she, Avery, and Lestrange had given Sirius frostbite, Potter bloody eyes, and Channing a twitching wrist.


	3. Detention

**) Chapter Three – Detention (**

When Bella was assigned by McGonagall to be Sirius' partner in detention, she knew the fates were against her. Of all the people who were being punished because of the Hogwarts Express incident, _any _of them—Lestrange, Avery, or Potter—would have been better than Sirius.

Well, maybe not Potter. But definitely Avery, and she would even have preferred Lestrange's snobbery to Sirius' leering.

And so she found herself in the most embarrassing, the most abhorrent detention she had ever faced: cleaning dinner dishes…with Sirius…in the kitchen…among the house-elves…_without magic. _

"You know, gluing your mouth shut wasn't actually one of the punishments," Sirius said conversationally, drying off a dish Bella had just handed him.

Bella hadn't said a word for the half an hour since they'd started, only ignored him haughtily and focused on washing. He had tried to make conversation a few times, all to no avail. This time was no different.

He grinned. "You really hate me, don't you?"

She rolled her eyes and sighed. "I hate you as much as I hate the Giant Squid. Meaning, I couldn't give a damn."

"That much, eh?" He seemed even more pleased.

"Oh, just shut up."

And surprisingly, he did.

* * *

The next evening after dinner, the two of them were at it again, scrubbing away while the house-elves hopped around them, happily cleaning the kitchen up. Sirius was being uncharacteristically mute, and Bella was desperately bored. She kept checking the clock, but the time crept by without Sirius' distracting comments.

She glanced over at him. He had a content, self-satisfied look on his face. He _had _to be doing this to annoy her, he just had to.

She refused to give him the satisfaction that she'd given him a moment's thought, so she said nothing and continued to clean, until the hours slowly melted away and she could escape to the familiar dungeons where she could chase away thoughts of Sirius by inventing new spells with her Slytherin cohorts.

* * *

"So, how's detention with the Traitor going?" Lestrange said, plopping down on the leather couch next to Bella.

It was Friday evening, right after they'd returned from their detentions. She was reading up on spells from a book she'd nicked from the Restricted Section of the library. She glanced over at him.

"Fine."

"Bet you wish you were working with Avery or me, huh?"

"If you say so," she said, turning a page of the book.

Lestrange reminded her strongly of Sirius, but was starting to annoy her even more—in a bad way.

_At least Sirius knows how to keep his mouth shut these days, _she thought. In fact, Sirius had been so quiet this week that she'd been racking her brain thinking of a way to start conversation without making it look like she _wanted_ to talk.

Lestrange glared at her as she read the book on the uses of the Imperius Curse. "Well, just so you know, Quidditch practices are starting soon, so you'd better try to stay out of trouble so you don't get any more detentions. It'll be hard finding another Beater, especially one as vicious as you."

She eyed him. "Same to you, Captain."

Silence followed as she continued reading.

Lestrange tried again. "I wonder who they'll find to be Seeker for Gryffindor now that Channing is out."

Bella turned the page.

His voice started to betray annoyance. "You know, you're probably the rudest girl I've ever met."

"You're breaking my heart."

He studied her disbelievingly, unable to fathom a girl who didn't swoon under his gaze. Finally, he pulled himself off the couch, muttering just audibly enough so she could hear it:

"_Bitch_."

* * *

The weekend seemed long, almost indecently long. Saturday and Sunday dragged as Bella got ahead in her homework and practiced the Imperius Curse with—and on—Severus Snape. The boy was greasy, annoying, and pathetically enamored with Lily Evans, but Bella could ignore all that because Snape was good, very good, at spells. They didn't do things to each other that were _too _damaging while under _Imperius_, but enough that they could sufficiently practice the nuances of making another person do what you desired.

The two days felt peculiarly empty without the nightly detention with Sirius. As much as it would have pained her to admit, over the past week she had come to anticipate—to almost look forward to—her time with Sirius. It was a battle of the wills: who would break first and speak? A tension had built around them even in the cheery kitchen, a tension that Bella hated…and reveled in.

So when Monday night's detention rolled around, she was almost cheerful. She smiled at Sirius when she walked in, making his mouth drop open with shock.

"You're in a good mood," he said, watching her warily. "You're not going to hex me, are you?"

"Would you like me to?" she asked slyly, surprising even herself with her flirty tone. She flipped her hair over her shoulder and studied him with mild interest.

He blinked his eyes, but quickly recovered and matched her tone. "It depends on what you'd do to me."

She couldn't back down now, not when she'd started the bantering. Besides, she was enjoying herself way too much. She looked him straight in the face (when had he become so handsome?) and said, "What would you like me to do?"

His eyes widened for a split second, betraying his shock. In true Sirius form, he recovered quickly. He studied her for a moment with a delightfully cocky expression, and then threw his rag into the sink with a splash. He closed the distance between them in one step and smashed his mouth against hers.

Bella was so shocked that she froze up, eyes bulging. Her mouth had been just the slightest bit open, making her feel vulnerable as Sirius pressed his face to hers. After a moment she recovered herself, pushing him away and giving him a sharp slap for his trouble.

"How dare you?" she shrieked, cheeks flushed. Her heart was pounding heavily in her chest; if she had looked closely, she would have seen that Sirius' breathing was just a bit faster than before. For a split second, Sirius had a stunned expression, but he covered it up with an unconvincing smirk.

"I knew you'd want me."

She nearly choked on her scoff. "Want _you?"_

He turned away and continued washing the plate he had been working on when she'd entered, ignoring her.

Feeling deeply unsettled, Bella watched him a moment, scoffed again, and started her detention duties.

Neither said anything for the rest of the time, but more than once Sirius caught Bella watching him, and each time he'd reward her with a sly wink.

* * *

That night, Bella had dreams. Not just the normal dreams about joining the secretive order of the Death Eaters after graduation and becoming the elusive Dark Lord's right hand, but about…Sirius. He made a grand entrance, and as with dreams that one isn't controlling, it took her a while to realize who it was. When she realized that it was him, she jerked awake with a start and looked around her dorm.

Her roommates were sleeping quietly in the dungeon room around her, but her heart was pounding and her covers sweaty.

It wasn't the appearance of Sirius that startled her, but what they'd been _doing_. She liked sensual dreams as much as the next girl, but the thought of Sirius and her—no, it was absolutely _abhorrent_!

She lay back down and tried to go to sleep, but replays of her last dream kept flashing across her mind. She fought against them as much as she could, but as she started dozing off, she thought, _It doesn't matter…they're only dreams…he'll never know…_

* * *

During free time the next day, Bella was dreadfully tired. As she sat at the base of a tall tree next to the lake, she allowed her eyes to droop, the late afternoon sun easing her into sleep. Her homework books lay open next to her as she reclaimed some of the sleep she'd lost in her turbulent and confusing dreams the night before.

The distant sound of chatter roused her a while later. A little ways away, Sirius, Potter, Remus Lupin, and Peter Pettigrew came strolling down towards the bank. Potter's arm was tightly wound around Lily Evans, and Sirius had his arm around a blonde Gryffindor girl. The eyes of the scattered groups of relaxing students followed the group as they strutted. As happened every year, James and Sirius were talking loudly, very aware of the admiring and jealous stares they received.

Bella's lip curled into a sneer at the sight of the fool Sirius. The idiot _always _had to make a show of how he could snag any girl in the school; now it disgusted her ever more than before, remembering that those vile lips had been pressed against hers for even a second.

"Always a spectacle," Snape said softly, lowering himself next to her.

She looked at him. His dark eyes were following the wonderful and popular Lily Evans hungrily, as if the very sight of her fed and sustained him.

"You never had a chance," Bella informed him indifferently. "You would do better to stop wasting your life pining for the most popular brat in the school and focus more on how you might serve the Dark Lord."

His eyes darted to her. "My service hasn't been affected, Bellatrix," he hissed. "And you would do well to stick your nose where it belongs."

He didn't get up and leave, however, because he had no one else to sit with. If he wished to stay by the lake he would be easy prey for the Gryffindor Four alone.

Snape glowered as Potter planted a light kiss on Evans' happy lips. Sirius started playing with the blonde's hair, and the sight of it gave Bella the strong urge to curse him. There they all were, so unaware, so unknowing, as the Dark Lord prepared his faithful Slytherins for the tasks he would have for them when they graduated.

"I shall particularly enjoy hexing Sirius into the next century, given the chance," she said.

"Detentions haven't been agreeable to you, then," Snape smiled, looking like he relished the vision of Bella miserably working next to Sirius.

Unlike the irritating Lestrange, Snape hadn't asked her about detention yet. When they were together, they only conversed about the business at hand. Neither cared about each other's lives, just about mastering spells that the Dark Lord's closest associates had assigned to them.

"That's putting it lightly," she snorted. "The fool is so self-absorbed he thinks even _I _will fall for him."

"He's more idiotic than I thought," Snape smirked. "He's made a move then, I take it."

"Unfortunately." She rolled her eyes. "I was rather startled, so I didn't hex his balls off. But if he tries again, he'll regret it for the rest of his life."

* * *

"I'm going to have to leave early today," Sirius informed Bella that evening when he arrived at detention, his robes and hair messy. There was no question about what he'd been doing.

"Yeah, right," Bella said, scraping out a greasy pan. "Like McGonagall's going to agree to that."

"She did."

"What?"

"She did. She said as long as you agreed to it, I could."

A smile grew on Bella's face. Even McGonagall couldn't say a flat "no" to the flattering Sirius! Apparently she'd thought she'd make Bella the meanie. The professor surely knew that there was no way Sirius was getting out of detention if Bella had anything to say about it.

"And what is so pressing that you think you can just skip out on detention?" she asked.

Sirius grinned triumphantly. "McGonagall thinks that," he made a pathetic expression, "I'm swamped with seventh year homework. But really, I just have a little date with Tracy."

Bella figured that Tracy was the blonde girl from earlier. "Guess again, fool. There's no way I'm going to be sitting around doing your dishes while you're snogging a dumb blonde!"

He seemed to enjoy the fact that Bella had insulted Tracy. "Snogging? Why, that's not all we do…."

"Slut!" Bella spat, banging the dishes harder than she meant to.

"My, my! It's not nice to call other girls that, don't you know?" he taunted.

She rounded on him, wand out. "I was talking about _you."_

He eyed her wand. "Hex me," he dared.

She hesitated.

"Hex me," he repeated.

"_Yarehum!"_

At once Sirius shot straight up as if he was a rocket, crashed into the high ceiling, and free-fell to the ground. As he fell, he pulled out his wand, pointed it at Bella's nose, and yelled, "_Engorgio!"_

She dove out of the way, but it hit her ear. She felt something growing heavy on the right side of her head, but she cried, "_Everte Statum_!"

Sirius rolled out of the way of the spell just as he landed, and a table exploded behind where he had been. They both had to cover their faces to protect themselves from the shattered pottery flying from the explosion. The house-elves were screeching and running around the room in a frenzy.

"_Allinsortia!" _Bella cried, and a large alligator flew out of her wand and charged at Sirius.

Just then, McGonagall burst into the room.

_"What is the ruckus about?"_ she screeched.

She instantly spotted the alligator, which was snapping at Sirius (who had jumped onto the counter to avoid it), and banished the animal with a flick of her wand.

_"Silence!"_ the beet-red professor yelled, stopping the scared house-elves in their tracks.

Bella and Sirius quickly tried to stow their wands away—but it wasn't quick enough for McGonagall, and Bella knew that she had another round of detentions ahead. At least this time she wouldn't be paired with Sirius.

But somehow, that wasn't comforting in the least.


	4. Quidditch

**) Chapter Four - Quidditch (**

It was hopeless.

Bella found herself waking up every night in a cold sweat, entangled in her damp sheets and amazed that she hadn't waken up her roommates.

She was in lust with the very last boy she would have ever expected to notice, with the boy she had once been betrothed to, but whose name she was now forbidden to say.

* * *

One week after her duel with Sirius, Bella was having dinner at the Slytherin table, but her mind was across the room at the Gryffindor table. Sirius was the center of attention over there, his grey eyes sparkling as he entertained a group of Gryffindors with a story of one of his many exploits. Potter was throwing in remarks, and glancing at Evans every couple seconds to see if she was watching him.

Bella observed how the students regarded Sirius. The Gryffindors thought Sirius and James were their mascots, even their gods. Students at other tables were watching with a mixture of jealousy and admiration. Even though the Slytherins ignored or mocked Sirius, Bella was becoming aware of undertones of jealousy in their voices that she'd never noticed before. Sirius was respected, and the more she saw that, the more attractive he was to her.

She liked power the power he had. It was _very_ desirable...

"Did you hear the news, Bella?" Andra said, leaning across the table towards her and blocking her view of the object of her thoughts.

"What news?" Bella asked, sipping some juice airily.

"_He_ is going to be playing Seeker in place of Channing at the Gryffindor/Slytherin match-up on Saturday," her brown-haired sister replied.

"Who?" Bella asked, raising her eyebrows in annoyance. Why couldn't Andra just speak plainly?

"_Him," _Andra said, bobbing her head in the direction of the Gryffindor table. "You know, who Mother said we mustn't speak of…?"

"Oh!" Bella laughed condescendingly. "You mean Sirius. I get it now."

Andra's eyes widened. "You mustn't speak His name!"

"Andra, are we children? No. Mother isn't here, so it's perfectly fine to say his name. What are we supposed to say?"

Narcissa, who had been sitting a little farther down on Andra's side but listening silently, leaned in. "Yeah, Andra, 'He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named' is already taken!" She looked at Bella for approval at her little joke.

"Cissy!" Bella snapped. "Don't speak of the Dark Lord's name so lightly!"

Narcissa's pale face fell. "I—I'm sorry, Bella. It wasn't really his _name_—"

Andra cut off whatever rebukes Bella would have made by interjecting, "As I was _saying, _He is going to be playing Seeker, and word is He's pretty good."

Bella let the subject of Voldemort drop. "Yeah, that's what Lestrange keeps harping on us."

"People are saying the only reason Sirius doesn't play the position normally is because he doesn't know how to listen to the Captain and is too distracting for the other members," Andra continued. "You'd better be sure to keep your eye on him, Bella. We can't start out the season with a Gryffindor win."

Ironically, keeping her eye on Sirius was exactly what Bella wanted to do.

* * *

The days passed more quickly without Bella staring at the clock, anticipating detentions with Sirius. Now that she had detention with Slughorn, there was nothing to look forward to, so time went back to its normal pace.

McGonagall had simply had enough of Bella and Sirius' antics, so she had assigned Bella to her Head of House even though she knew Slughorn would be easy on her. There was only so much even McGonagall could take, apparently.

Bella had heard that Sirius was assigned to Apollyon Pringle, the caretaker, and was doing menial cleaning tasks for him. She, on the other hand, was doing simple lines while Slughorn pleasantly chatted away with her. It was a waste of time, because she would rather be studying up on Dark Curses or going ahead in homework, but thankfully Slughorn always let her out early.

* * *

The weather for Quidditch was perfect that Saturday. The late-September afternoon had only the slightest twinge of cold in it.

As she suited up in the locker room before the match, Lestrange gave them their normal "pep" talk, going right up to each person and sticking his face right into theirs.

"…And Martin!" Lestrange said, looking fierce as he yelled into the face of the other Beater, "I want you to find that bastard Sirius Black and smack that Bludger right into his filthy traitorous face!"

"Yes, Captain!" Martin yelled, getting riled up by Lestrange's army-like yelling.

"Same goes for you, Black!" Lestrange yelled as he passed by.

Bella had never had much taste for his speeches. Lestrange usually left her with little specs of spit on her face after he was done. Very distasteful.

However, she yelled in a half-mocking way, "Ay, ay, sir!"

Lestrange knew how Bella hated his talks, and he ignored her fake enthusiasm. Perhaps it was because she was so good at breaking bones with the force of her Bludgers that he allowed her half-hearted mockery of him. She didn't think on it much, however. As long as Lestrange left her to do her own thing, she was fine.

After the talk, the whole team was pumped up and ready to destroy some Gryffindor ass. Bella was the only calm one, thinking about ways she could mix up her strategy and technique this game. She hated to be predictable.

The teams flew onto the field to cheers and jeers—mostly jeers.

Bella smirked as she circled the field with her team, bat in hand. She knew the other Houses loved to hate the Slytherins because the Slytherins were good, fierce, and played to win. Bella was known for being especially vicious, not caring at all if someone was in the hospital ward for weeks after being hit with one of her Bludgers. In fact, it was her goal: if someone on the other side _wasn't _in the hospital by the end of the game, she'd be disappointed.

_What a shame that Sirius will be in the hospital wing where I can't watch him, _she thought with sardonic amusement.

The players took their places around the center of the pitch, ready for the game to start. Sirius was floating high above them in the Gryffindor Seeker's spot, looking mightily handsome with the breeze blowing through his dark hair. When she looked up at him, she was saw he had been watching her. He winked at her flirtatiously and looked down at the referee, the Hufflepuff Head of House, Professor Squalk.

Squalk was an elderly man who was almost bald and had huge, owl-like eyes. He had bad eye-sight, so it was easy to avoid penalties around him.

He blew the whistle, and game-play started.

Potter, the Chaser for Gryffindor, quickly obtained the Quaffle and scored with little difficulty. That started off what turned out to be a bad game for Slytherin. In half an hour, the score was 80 to 20 for Gryffindor.

It wasn't for a lack of enthusiasm that Slytherin was losing. In fact, they were extremely brutal and had injured many of the players on the other team, setting off rounds of resounding boos around the stadium; it was because they were focusing too _much_ on being rough, and not enough on the actual game. When the score reach 100 to 30, Lestrange called a time-out.

"Listen!" he roared to the huddled team, "All we need to do is stop them from scoring and have Ward get the Snitch _now_!"

"It's that simple, is it?" Bella snarled, frustrated. She'd been off the whole game and hadn't had a solid, bone-crushing hit yet.

"Black, Martin, you've got to step up and focus on Sirius Black. He can_not_ get near the Snitch, got it?" Lestrange continued. "Unless you have a chance to stop someone from scoring, you need to keep an eye on Sirius Black. Better to keep the game going than to lose!"

The game restarted, and Bella focused harder than ever. She chased a Bludger and hit it hard in Sirius' direction; he barely dodged it.

"You'll have to work harder than that if you wanna hit me, Bella!" Sirius taunted her as he leveled out on his broomstick.

She gritted her teeth. When the other Bludger was in her vicinity, she whacked it towards him again, this time harder. It didn't get close to him, however, because he had suddenly darted off.

Ward had been watching Sirius and was already racing in the same direction. They'd both spotted the Snitch, which was hovering near the stands on the side of the Gryffindor goalpost.

Bella raced towards the first Bludger desperately; she just _had_ to stop Sirius from getting the Snitch first, whether by hitting him or deterring him. The game rested on it! She lunged for the Bludger and beat it back straight at Sirius, who was slightly ahead of Ward as they raced towards the Snitch.

As if in slow motion, the well-hit Bludger raced towards Sirius. If he didn't veer off course, it was on track to crash right into his head. Bella, the closest player to the action, saw that he had no idea it was near him. The rest of the game had stopped, and everyone was hovering anxiously and watching the race. The crowd roared as the Seekers battled it out, Sirius slightly ahead of Ward. Some of Sirius' team-mates called out warnings to him, but he was too focused to hear them, his eyes firmly on the Snitch.

Bella held her breath as she watched the Bludger fly towards Sirius. At best, it would seriously injure him. At worst...he would never ever bother Bella again.

It was mere feet from him when she heard someone nearby yell: "Sirius—look out!"

Sirius heard, and veered away from the spot where he would have collided with the Bludger. That allowed Ward the chance to surge forward and grab the Snitch—just before the Bludger blasted him in the stomach. Ward fell to the ground, Snitch still in hand, as the crowd roared with delight and anger.

Bella looked around to see who had called out Sirius' name in such an alarmed voice.

No one was near.

Bella looked to Sirius, who had rounded about and was now floating meters in front of her. He was facing her and looking her in the eyes with the most peculiar expression on his face. His mouth was slightly ajar, and his eyes were wide.

Suddenly, her hand flew to her mouth in realization: it was _she _who had called out his name!

Her face reddened in embarrassment and confusion. Why in the world had she done that? She was very attracted to him, yes, but that didn't mean she actually _cared _about him! She certainly cared more about winning a game of Quidditch than she did for him! He was just a lust object to get her through the night!

Bella became aware that she had been staring at him back as these thoughts had been racing through her mind. To recover, she flipped her thick black hair over her shoulder and floated down to the ground to celebrate with her teammates. She didn't look back up at him again, but she could feel his eyes following her the whole time.

But it could have been her imagination.

"Good job, Black!" Lestrange said as they folded up their Quidditch robes. He and Bella were the last players to leave the Slytherin locker room. "You really saved the day."

"I know," she said haughtily.

No one else had heard her call out to Sirius—the crowd had been too loud—and she was the savior of the game for allowing Ward to grab the Snitch. She'd been basking in the post-game praises for an hour, and she loved every second of it.

He looked over at her sideways, not sure if she was trying to be funny. She looked at him and grinned, a rare sight on her face. It looked unnatural on her, but very becoming.

Lestrange's face melted into a smile, and he shook his head as he headed out. "You're really something, Black. I'm gonna go check on Ward in the hospital wing. You wanna come?"

"In a bit," she replied, and he left.

She smiled as she continued sorting the equipment that she'd removed. After a moment, she looked up. She sensed something—someone was in the room. The air rippled a ways in front of her.

"Show yourself," she ordered whomever it was lurking around. She wasn't terribly frightened, but all the same, her hand slipped toward her wand...

A male voice muttered an incantation, and the body of Sirius formed three meters in front of her out of thin air. He had been disillusioned. He stared at her in the same manner he had just after she'd called out his name during the game.

She scoffed and started to turn away. "What do _you_ want?"

"You should smile more."

She looked back at him. "Pardon _me_?"

He stepped forward, eyes locked with hers. "You're gorgeous when you smile. You should do it more often."

For perhaps the first time in her life, Bella truly had no reply. She knew she was a relatively attractive young woman, but she couldn't remember a time that someone had ever said something so blunt—and complimentary—to her face.

"Uhh…" she said dumbly, staring at him as he continued forward. It didn't occur to her to thank him. She couldn't even think of anything cruel to say, which was also a first for her.

He stopped close to her, too close. She stood rooted on the spot, both from pride and simply because her mind was blank. All she could do was stare up at him and wait.

"You called my name," he said.

There was no cockiness. Just Sirius looking at her with those eyes. This was a different Sirius than the one who'd grabbed her and kissed her earlier, at least it seemed so. Maybe this one had just been hidden underneath all along.

"Did I?" she asked, staring up at him.

Her heart was thumping in her chest. He was so close, and unlike the time he had invaded her personal space in the hospital wing, this time was thrilling...and a little bit scary. This was supposed to happen in her dreams, not in real life!

She hadn't realized he was this much taller than her, for she was a tall girl herself. But he was leaning in, looking at her lips, taking his time with his reply….

Bella's breath was becoming shorter, and her mind was a blank. All she could think about was how much she wanted to kiss those handsome lips….

"You did," he stated with a small smile.

It was as if his reply had opened the floodgates, because she could no longer control herself. She grabbed the back of his neck, blurted breathlessly, "Many apologies!" and pressed her lips against his.

She kissed him hard, and he didn't pull away. One of his arms looped around and gripped her lower back. He was a very good kisser, and she allowed her mind to shut down and simply feel the sensation of his warm lips…his tongue…

In a flash, she came to her senses: she, Bellatrix Black, was kissing the pompous Sirius Black, the very same one who had rudely grabbed her in the kitchen. She couldn't throw herself at him like every other girl in the school did!

She jerked back, using the hand that had grabbed him to push his chest away from her.

"What is it?"

"I—can't—" she said haltingly, shaking her head as she stared up at him. His eyes were so entrancing even now.

"Why not?" he said, closing the space between them and looping his arms around her waist.

"I refuse to be another one of your conquests!"

"You certainly aren't," he smiled, squeezing her waist against his stomach.

She eyed him warily, allowing a half-smile to grow on her face. He watched her expression, and a smile grew on his face as well.

"All right then," she grinned, feeling flirty and attractive for the first time in her life. "You win, Sirius."

She was about to kiss him again, but she hesitated, her lips brushing against his as she said: "This time."


	5. Seduction

**) Chapter Five - Seduction (**

_The world faded away as his lips moved over hers. His tongue moved in her mouth sensuously. She took his bottom lip in-between her teeth and pulled on it teasingly. _

_It felt like one of her dreams—only better. Because it was _real.

_Her hands raked through his dark, shaggy hair. His hands slipped up the back of her shirt, caressing the bare skin of her back. They swayed in the locker room, losing their balance as they struggled to touch the other—_

"Bella!" a low voice snapped.

Bella blinked, her daydream shattered. She came back to the present and saw that she was in the dungeon for Potions. Slughorn was waddling around the room, examining the students' work. At her table sat Snape and two other Slytherins.

Bella glared at Snape. "What?" she snapped, angry to be disturbed from her thoughts.

"Excuse me for interrupting your nap, but your _potion_ is _purple_," he said, frowning.

Bella looked in her cauldron and saw that her potion was indeed a bright shade of violet. She swore angrily.

"Why didn't you tell me sooner?" she demanded, grabbing some frog feet in a last-ditch attempt to salvage the potion.

"You need to start paying attention to your classes, Bellatrix," he admonished. He leaned in. "The Dark Lord would be most displeased if he knew how lazy you're becoming!"

"I'm not lazy!" she retorted. "I've just got a lot on my mind."

Snape lifted an eyebrow. "Oh? And what's so important that excuses you from getting a D on your Transfiguration paper?"

Just then, the door to the dungeon opened. Sirius strutted in proudly, ignoring the whispers and jeers from the Slytherins.

Bella's stomach dropped. Ever since their snogging session in the locker room, she had avoided him. She felt the strangest feelings when she was around him: He intimidated her like he never had before, and yet she desperately wanted to be near him. She was unable to concentrate on anything. She would replay the kiss in her mind over and over, and agonized about the significance of a sly look that he might have given her when they passed in the hallway between classes. She desperately wanted to know what he was thinking, but lacked the humility to ask.

"Hello, Mr. Black," Slughorn said jovially. "What can I do for you today?"

Sirius handed him a note. "Professor McGonagall wants to see Bellatrix Black. Sounds urgent."

Bella and Snape glanced at each other in confusion. What in the world would McGonagall want her for?

Slughorn scanned it. "Hm...Very well. Miss Black?"

Bella stood, avoiding Sirius' eyes. "Yes, sir?"

"Mr. Black will take you to Professor McGonagall."

"Yes, sir," she nodded. She stood and went towards Sirius, finally looking at him. Their eyes met, but his expression was unreadable.

"Mr. Snape, please watch over Miss Black's potion."

Sirius turned to the door, and she followed him out of the classroom. Curious murmurs followed them out. Sirius said nothing, but led her away from the classrooms.

"Where are we going?" Bella finally asked. "McGonagall's office is that way."

He turned back look at her. A small smile was on his face. "We're not going to McGonagall."

Her brow furrowed, and her hand drifted toward her wand. "Then where?"

Her smiled at her and grabbed her hand, pulling her into an empty side room. He shut the door behind him.

"What are you _doing_?" she demanded.

"This," he said. He pushed her against the stone wall, tilted her chin up with his hand, and kissed her hard.

She was stunned, but quickly regained her wits. She freed her mouth and exclaimed, "You took me out of class to snog?"

He grinned. "Exactly." He leaned in again.

"Wait, wait, wait!"

"Oh, don't pretend to actually be annoyed! I've seen how you've looked at me. You want me," he said matter-of-factly.

"I—um—no! No!" Bella stuttered.

Sirius raised his eyebrows challengingly. He stepped back. "Fine, then. There's the door. You can go back to your boring Potions class."

She stared at him. Of course she didn't want to go back, but she didn't want to admit that she actually _liked _it—no, _loved _it—that Sirius had been thinking about her as well, and had skipped his class to save her from _her _class. An image of her sitting in Potions with only her miserable purple potion and her imagination to keep her company passed through her mind, and she knew there was no way she was leaving Sirius.

She rolled her eyes and grabbed his robes, pulling him back against her. "Oh, get over here!"

* * *

Bella had never had much interest in romance. She scorned the giggly girls and boasting boys with a passion. Love didn't exist: Only lust and loneliness. If you need someone so you don't feel lonely, you romanticize it by calling it love. If you lust for someone, you also call it love. Love was nothing but an acceptable word to describe human selfishness.

She still believed all of this, yet she found herself becoming the very person she used to hate. Bellatrix Black was becoming a Happy Person against her will. She would try to hide it, but it was hard to conceal the smile that had decided to live on her face permanently.

Her cousin, Sirius Black, was to blame.

The teenagers couldn't get enough of each other. They would sneak out at night, laughing and fumbling around in the dark. They would meet during classes at arranged times, supposedly on bathroom breaks. On Hogsmeade days they would meet in alleys, making up excuses to their friends.

It was an unspoken agreement that it was to be kept a secret. What would their friends say if they suddenly announced that they were seeing someone from the enemy House? And not _just _the enemy House, but someone as reviled to their respective parties as Bellatrix Black or Sirius Black? It was unthinkable. They were both too proud to endure that kind of scorn.

* * *

The first snow fell early that year. Cheer was in the air, especially since there was a rumor that there was to be a Christmas ball that year. Sirius and Potter had enchanted snowballs to fly through the school, following students and smacking them in the face. Apollyon Pringle the caretaker was beside himself trying to catch the snowballs, and students would stop and watch as he leapt after them.

It was on one of these cold days, when the air in the hallways was cold and a new layer of snow was falling outside, when Bella got a note:

_Lunch. Our spot. _

Bella met Sirius outside their normal place in the upper levels of the castle. Their spot was a deserted storage room that had assorted chairs, desks, and couches in it. It was the perfect room for a couple of teenagers to learn useful "tricks."

She rounded the corner and smiled when she saw Sirius leaning against the wall. He was conjuring more snowballs. They hovered in front of his wand.

He grinned and made a sharp movement with his wand, sending them towards her. She laughed, diving to the side and whipping out her wand. The snowballs went zooming back towards him.

"Hey!" he hollered.

He ducked to the side, but she sent them after him again, giggling.

"Don't start something you can't finish!" she taunted.

"All right, you asked for it!" he said.

He conjured more snowballs and shot them at her. She tried to avoid them, but one hit her on the side of her face. She shot the rest back at him. She conjured more as they went, sending a whole barrage at him. One by one they hit him, showering snow on the floor.

Suddenly, Bella stopped, hearing a noise. She turned away and looked behind her where the corridor turned right.

A snowball hit her in the face, and Sirius laughed. She put her hand to her lips and tiptoed to look around the corner.

Her eyes widened: Pringle was coming down the corridor, attracted by the noise.

She looked at Sirius with alarm and mouthed, "Pringle!"

Sirius rushed over, grabbed her hand, and said, "Follow me!"

They ran down the corridor, hoping that they could get around the corner before Pringle saw them. He must have seen their backs for the quickest of seconds, because they heard him yell, "_Hey!" _just when they rounded the corner.

They ran as fast as they could. Bella wasn't paying attention to where they were going. Sirius stopped suddenly, and she almost crashed into him.

"In here!" he whispered, pointing to a door. He held it open for her to duck in, and then quickly followed her, shutting it and locking it with his wand.

Bella looked around, breathing hard. It was a dusty, deserted classroom with an old skeleton handing precariously from the ceiling.

"This classroom doesn't look like it's been used in a century," she said. "I hope you know your way back, because I sure as hell don't."

He had his hands on his knees, trying to catch his breath. He shook his head. "Don't worry about that." He stood up and grinned. "Think old Pringle has any idea it's us?"

She shrugged. "Didn't see our faces. I doubt he'd ever suspect that we'd be together."

"You're right about that! All the same, we'd better stay in here until lunch is over so we don't get caught."

She sauntered over to him. "Then we'd better take advantage of the free time…"

She kissed him softly. He grabbed the sides of her head and kissed her back, a little harder. She staggered to the side to catch her balance.

They had kissed countless times, but this time was different. They had experimented, but had never gone the full way. It was always on their minds, but it had been a torturous game to see how long they could hold out…how close they could get without actually doing the deed.

Now neither of them was the least bit interested in tempting the other into asking for the whole deal this time. They were of one mind. They weren't teasing each other; they weren't laughing. They were gripping each other, reaching under clothing. Some uncontrollable force was driving them.

The sound of a desk scraping on the ground interrupted their heavy breathing as Bella's behind connected with it. Sirius steadied the desk with one of his hands, and with the other he gripped her backside and lifted her onto it. She wrapped her legs around him and undid the clasp to his cape. It fell to the ground behind him.

Bella's heart was pounding, and her mouth was slack as Sirius kissed her neck. Though the air was chilly, she was desperate to remove her cape, which she did clumsily.

She took his hand and placed it over the buttons of her shirt. He pulled back and looked her in the eye, cheeks red and panting for breath.

"Take it off already," she smirked.

He slowly unbuttoned it, staring at her body. He reached under her collar and ran his hands down her bare arms, pushing the shirt off as he went.

At any other time, Bella might have felt self-conscious. Right now, she didn't care.

Sirius was suddenly kissing her again, running his hands all over her—her arms, her shoulders, her bra, under her skirt and up her thighs...

Small, involuntary gasps that escaped from Bella's open mouth let him know what he was doing right. Like any girl, she had experimented alone, but with him was infinitely better. She had no idea that it was possible to feel this way.

This was deliciously wrong. It was completely against what her mother would have wished. Of all the people to be her "first," Sirius would be the very bottom of Druella's list—below the bottom. He wouldn't have been allowed on the list if he was the last male on earth!

Bella was no longer willing to let Sirius have the control anymore. With a flip of her wand, Sirius was laying on his back on the cool stone floor. He was winded at first, but grinned as she strolled over and straddled his stomach. She removed his shirt, and had the pleasant view of his tight, heaving chest. She kissed him saucily on the lips, and then teased him by running her tongue down his chest….

Soon his pants were gone as well. He pushed her off of him and rolled on top of her, stretching her arms straight above her head and interlocking his fingers with hers.

She breathed into his neck, licking his shoulder. "Now, Sirius…now!"

He happily obliged, reaching under her skirt to remove her undergarments. She gasped when he entered her, trying to understand the new sensation. Their bodies rubbed as they writhed on the cold floor. Sirius grabbed his wand and murmured a spell, to which Bella emitted a raw, guttural sound.

Before long, Bella and Sirius were laying side-by-side on the ground, staring up at the skeleton on the ceiling, their breath slowing down. Bella felt tired but content. The cold ground was an interesting contrast against her damp bare body; now neither of them were wearing anything but their socks and shoes. It would have been a comical sight if anyone else had entered, but it was the furthest thing from their minds.

They tilted their heads to look at each other. Neither wanted to be the first to react, but Bella couldn't help it. She smiled in her haughty way.

"That was good," she said.

"Of course—what did you expect?"

She didn't answer, merely grinned.

He smiled back.

They looked away from each other and stared at the ceiling.

Sirius' hand inched towards hers. His fingers intertwined with hers and squeezed.

Strangely, at that little gesture, Bella felt closer to Sirius than she ever had before. And she had never felt so goddamn happy in her life.


	6. Invitation

**) Chapter Six – Invitation (**

Bella stirred her tea with habitual disinterest. Slug Club had always bored her, and she only attended to stay on the good side of Professor Slughorn, her Head of House. Today was no different. Slughorn was trying to get student's comments on the latest ruling by the Ministry of Magic, his eagerness to see the depth of each student's insight apparent.

The students sat around the circular table, taking turns saying their thoughts. Bella had already spoken, which gave her free reign for her mind to wander to far more interesting topics.

And what, or _who, _was more interesting than Ministry legislation? Truthfully, just about anyone, but there was a certain person who occupied Bella's thoughts more than she would ever admit aloud, and it was to him that her mind travelled.

Bella had to keep a straight face thinking of the burning look Sirius had snuck her when they had passed leaving the Quidditch pitch last Saturday. He had been with his gang of fools, laughing and playing an admittedly harmless trick on some hapless third year, but when he saw her, a delicious look came across his face. It was a passing glance, and an observer would have easily mistaken it as hatred. However, Bella knew what it meant: he was also thinking of tonight, when they had arranged to meet after Slug Club.

She glanced at the grandfather clock in the corner. Half an hour to go! She couldn't wait to tell him about the ridiculous spell that Hufflepuff Michael McBirch had done in Transfiguration. The idiot had tried changing an old shoe into a rabbit, but had turned it into a huge scorpion. The class had been in havoc while the scorpion scuttled around trying to sting students until McGonagall was able to get a clear shot at it and transform it in to a shoe again. A couple of students had even been stung and sent to the hospital wing!

Bella had also read of a new pleasure spell in the "Adults Only" book hidden in the back of the Restricted Section when she was supposed to be researching a counter-spell to a curse that Snape had come up with. She and he often took turns Disillusioning themselves and sneaking into the restricted section to do their research for the Dark Lord. But one night, Bella had stumbled upon "Madame Hande's Tips and Tricks for Lovers Cursed by Cupid," and she hadn't been able to restrain her curiosity. Why it was in a school's library at all was a question to ponder….

Sirius was in for a treat tonight.

"And now, to our last matter of business this evening," Slughorn said.

Bella's ears pricked at the term "last matter of business." She put down her tea.

"We need to decide details for our club's ball," Slughorn said, pulling at his moustache.

Bella cringed. This would take a while. She had forgotten that the Slug Club was hosting a ball this year. Every year they had some sort of party, but this year was going to be more extravagant because many of Slughorn's favorites would be graduating in the summer.

"I have no doubt you all have been thinking of ideas, and now is the time to share," Slughorn said.

Some girls pulled out scrolls filled with notes. Bella prepared to disengage again. Details such as what decorations they should have, where the party should be, and whether the event would be open to the whole school or just the club went back and forth across the table.

"It would be nice to be open to the whole school, but if we're going to use the classroom we already reserved, we can't fit the whole school in there, even if it was magically increased," Lily Evans pointed out.

"Very good point, Miss Evans!" Slughorn said, beaming at his favorite Gryffindor.

Bella wanted to roll her eyes. Lucius Malfoy, seated to Bella's left, grunted softly.

"It could be by invitation only," a Hufflepuff sixth year by the name of Helen Green volunteered. "You know, just all of us members, and those that we invite as our dates."

"How does that sound to everyone?" Slughorn asked the group.

The group murmured its agreement, and after some final words and instructions from Slughorn to find dates as soon as possible, the group dispersed.

Bella jumped from her seat and was one of the first out of the door. The meeting had gone too long, and Sirius would already be waiting for her.

"So, who are you going to ask?"

Bella blinked and saw that Lestrange had sidled up next to her.

"Going to ask what?" she asked.

"To the ball."

"Oh…I hadn't given it much thought," she said distractedly, wishing he would go away so she could sneak off.

"You could go with me."

"In your dreams, Lestrange," she snorted.

"You know, you don't always have to be such a bloody bitch, Black," he said, glaring at her.

She stopped and said sarcastically, "I don't?"

He shook his head and scoffed before stomping down the hall away from her. Bella glanced around to make sure she was alone, and then she slipped down a side passage.

* * *

Bella entered the Great Hall for lunch the next day, headed for where her sisters usually sat at the Slytherin table. She plopped down across from them and put down her schoolbooks.

"You look tired," Andromeda said bluntly, sipping on some soup.

"Didn't get to bed until late," Bella replied. Her gaze glided over to the Gryffindor table, where Sirius' group was laughing loudly.

Sirius' grey eyes instantly met hers. Bella looked away, a smile playing on her lips.

"What are you looking at?" Narcissa asked, looking behind her.

"Nothing," Bella said, dipping a spoon into the bowl that had appeared in front of her. "So, have you girls heard about the Slug Club's ball next month?"

Narcissa nodded.

Andromeda shrugged. "What's it to us?"

"I have to bring a date. Either of you want to go with me?"

Andromeda snorted. "No, thanks. You know I have no interest in the Slug Club."

Narcissa's pale cheeks reddened. "I—I would, Bella, but…" She paused, and then said in one quick breath: "Someone's-already-asked-me!"

Both sisters looked that the youngest with surprise.

"Someone asked you?" Bella demanded.

"Who?" Andromeda exclaimed.

"Lucius Malfoy," Narcissa whispered.

Both sisters were speechless.

"You're not going with him, are you?" Andromeda asked.

"Of course she is!" Bella said. "Why wouldn't she?"

"Malfoy's just..." Andromeda glanced down the table where he was eating. "He's just...stuck up."

Bella smirked. "If that's the worst you can say about him, then he's a pretty good catch. He's rich and pureblood. Mother would wet her knickers if she knew Cissy had caught his eye."

"I just think Cissy's too good for him. _And_ a little too young," Andromeda said. When she saw Narcissa ready to protest, she changed the direction of the conversation. "Anyway, why are you asking us to be your date, Bella? I'm sure loads of boys are going to ask you."

"Not after it gets out that I've turned down Rodolphus Lestrange," Bella admitted.

"You _what?_" came Narcissa.

Even Andromeda looked surprised. "Bella, he's the most popular Slytherin in the school! You and he are like a match made in pureblood heaven!"

"I know, I know," Bella sighed. "I wasn't thinking."

"Who's going to go with you now? Severus Snape?" Andromeda asked.

"I'd rather die than go with him."

"Why?" Narcissa asked. "He's your friend, isn't he?"

"Eh…sort of…"

Sirius was leaving the lunchroom, and Bella watched his back as he juggled some apples to the delight of the Ravenclaw girls.

A thought trickled into her mind: there may yet be one boy who she could ask, one that was not only as popular and handsome as Lestrange, but who would also tick Lestrange off…

* * *

Bella hid in the shadows around the corner to where she knew Sirius had his first class after lunch. She watched as the class filed into the classroom, and predictably, Sirius and his friend Pettigrew were almost late.

Bella pulled out her wand and shot a spark at Sirius' behind just before they entered the doors.

"Ouch!" he exclaimed. He looked behind him, frowning and rubbing the tender spot. He spotted her, and his frown went away.

"Are you all right?" Pettigrew asked concernedly.

"Eh, yeah," he said. "You go on in. I'll be in in a minute."

Pettigrew nodded, and Sirius waited until the door was shut behind his friend. He then headed over to her.

"That _did_ hurt, you know," he said.

Bella put her hands on his shoulders and planted a long kiss on his lips.

"All better?" she asked.

He squinted his eyes. "One more should do the trick."

When they pulled back for breath, he said, "So, what are you here for?"

Bella hesitated, feeling uncharacteristically nervous. She cleared her throat. "I…um…assume you heard about Slughorn's ball."

"Who hasn't?" He squeezed her waist.

"Well, Lestrange asked me, you see…"

He lifted his eyebrows. "And…"

"And I said no…so I was wondering if you might want to go with me…"

He looked shocked. "You want _me _to go with _you_?"

She nodded, forcing herself to keep looking him in the eye.

"I—um—_wow_! Bella—that's…um…"

Bella waited as he let go of her and scratched his head awkwardly.

"It's okay if you say no, Sirius," she added quickly. "It's just that we've been…you know…for quite a while now…and if we keep this up, people are going to find out, so…"

"Bella, we can't _tell_ people about us. That'd be ridiculous. We'd be the laughingstock of the school. You and me, we're—we're not the same. You're—you're _you, _all dark and still connected to our—your—family, and I'm not _like_ you…"

"Oh—okay…" Bella said, feeling awful for imagining that they could just waltz into the ball arm in arm, careless about what their friends and family would think.

"And...I already told Helen Green I'd go with her."

Bella felt like she had been slapped.

"Well, you'd better get to class," she swallowed, trying to retain some dignity. "I'll see you later."

She swung her bag over her shoulders and strode away, trying to ignore how itchy her eyes had become all of a sudden.


	7. Jealousy

**) Chapter Seven – Jealousy (**

"Stop, stop, _stop_!" Snape shouted.

"_What_?" Bella asked, exasperated.

"You're doing it wrong again!"

"I am not!"

Snape threw his hands up and closed the distance between them in the deserted classroom. His dark eyes displayed his frustration.

"You are too, Bella, and you had better get it together! Every day that goes by is another day closer to meeting the Dark Lord. If you want to look like a bumbling idiot, be my guest. But I'm not going to waste any more time if you're not concentrating!"

"I _am_ concentrating!" Bella snapped furiously, sparks shooting from her wand. "I _am! _I don't know what's wrong with me!"

"Sure you don't!" Snape spat. "I know you've been hiding something from me. Ever since school's started you've been slipping up, and these past few weeks have been worse than ever!"

Her magic had been inexplicably hard to contain for weeks now. Sometime it got much too strong, which resulted in her blowing something up in class. Sometimes it was too weak for her to do the simplest spell. It was maddening to not be in control, and she couldn't place what was wrong with her.

"You need to apply yourself, or I refuse to practice with you!" he said.

"I'm trying, I really am!"

"It's all in your mind, Bella," he said. "You have to fix whatever needs to be fixed, and then we can get back to work."

"It's _not_ in my mind! My power levels are changing all the time and I can't control it!"

"Go to Pomfrey, then!" he spat, heading to the door. "Get checked out. When you are able to practice above the level of a first year, let me know!"

The door slammed behind him, and the sound echoed through the room. Bella stared at the door dismally.

Maybe she did know what was wrong with her.

_You're lovesick, _the mean part of her mind taunted.

_I am not! _her proud side protested.

_You are too! You're angry Sirius won't go with you to the ball. You're letting it distract you._

_What can I do about it? He said no—he's going with Helen Green. _

_Well, you can hex the bitch…_

_Sirius will know why I did it, and it'll make him too damn cocky. Besides, I can't be getting into any more trouble this year. I'll already be getting hell from Mother this Christmas about all my detentions._

Bella continued her inner battle all the way back to the Slytherin common room. The room was deserted, as most students were outside enjoying the sunny day in the snow. She flopped onto the leathery couch and played with her wand distractedly.

What she needed was a date to the ball. A good date. A handsome, delicious date that would make Sirius jealous and Lestrange less convinced that he was good enough for her.

But who could she bring?

She thought of the best-looking seventh years in the school. Hufflepuffs were out of the question. They were too dumb to waste her time with. Any Ravenclaws? She couldn't think of any good enough that didn't already have girlfriends. Gryffindors? Her lip curled at the thought. It _would _be good revenge to bring one of Sirius' buddies to the ball, but she knew that they wouldn't go with her (and she didn't have any interest in feeding their egos by asking). That left her back with her own house of Slytherin.

Lestrange was, of course, the most handsome boy. There was also Malfoy, who wasn't bad looking himself, but he was a sixth year and had asked Narcissa already. She visualized each boy she could remember, ticking them off in her mind as she came to them. She felt like there was someone she was forgetting, but she couldn't put her finger on it.

"Hey, Bella."

She snapped out of her thoughts and was pleasantly surprised to see her cousin Regulus throw down his wet jacket and flop down across from her. She didn't see Regulus much, as he was often with his posse and was a year behind her, but she was always comfortable with him. They seemed to understand each other, and he always went out of his way to be friendly with her.

"Hi," she responded, feeling a slow, evil grin growing on her face….

"Just got back from messing with the giant squid. A couple of us were breaking though the ice and feeding it random junk. Hey—what's that smirk about?"

"I want you to take me to Slughorn's ball."

He sat up. "Me? Really?"

"Yeah, you. Why not?"

"Well, everyone knows how you turned down Rodolphus, so we all figured you had someone special up your sleeve..."

"You're family and a pureblood, so I'd say you're special enough."

She saw him struggling with his answer, stumbling over incoherent words, so she stood up. She was not going to wait for another refusal like the one Sirius had given her.

"W-w-wait—where are you going?"

"You don't seem interested," she shrugged, "so…"

He jumped to his feet. "No, no, I am interested! Most definitely! I'm just really…flattered…you thought of me!"

Bella raised her eyebrows, feeling a familiar and welcome surge of pride. "Is that so?"

He grinned and came over. He was a couple of inches shorter than Sirius, but still had a good height to be her date.

"It's so," he said.

"Then it's a date," Bella said, swishing her hair. "I'll meet you here fifteen minutes before the party starts. I have something special for us to have before we go."

* * *

"Something special" turned out to be a bottle of firewhisky that Bella had been hiding in her trunk for a special occasion. She wasn't much of a drinker (alcohol impedes the senses and messes with reflexes), but she had stolen it from the Hog's Head last spring, and hadn't had the opportunity to have it. Now was the perfect time to sample it.

After helping Narcissa get ready and shooing her off to meet Lucius Malfoy, Bella dressed in a dress she had purposely ordered by mail the day after Sirius had refused her. She also put some waves into her long dark hair and applied some make-up. When she was done, she fished through her trunk to find the glass bottle.

"What's that?" Matilda, one of her dorm mates who was going with a fifth-year Slytherin, asked.

Regina, another roommate, came over. "That can't be what I think it is!"

"It is," Bella said smugly, standing up. "Ogden's Old Firewhisky!"

"You could get into so much trouble with that!" Matilda said, looking impressed.

Bella smirked. "Who's going to know besides us?"

After benevolently sharing a fourth of her bottle with her dorm mates, Bella slipped a shawl over her arm and strategically held the bottle beneath it. Then she made her way out to the dim green light of the common room.

Regulus was there to meet her, looking very dapper in his dress robes. His dark hair was slicked back, which showed his good facial structure. He had been pacing, but when she stepped into the room, he whirled towards the sound of the "clack" of her shoe.

When he saw her, his mouth slacked.

She raised her eyebrows and did a slow twirl. She was wearing a dark purple satin halter dress that plunged to a point at her back, and was very low and tight in the front, giving her the illusion of even more cleavage than she had. The dress went all the way to the floor, covering her heels that made her even taller.

It was a _very _grown-up dress. She had become confident in her good looks, and had no doubt that every eye would be on her at the party.

"You like?" she teased.

He cleared his throat a couple of times. "I—um—_do_."

"Good," she said saucily. "'Cause I have something else for you."

She pulled out the bottle of Ogden's. Regulus looked like he had died and went to heaven.

"Shall we get a little more…_prepared…_for the party?" she asked.

More than an hour later, Bella and Regulus were making their way to the party, Bella's shawl and empty bottle now safely back in her trunk. Bella hung onto Regulus' arm, feeling hot in the cool halls even though so much skin was exposed.

"And then I shooed—I mean, should—I mean, _said," _Regulus said, unable to walk a straight line and making Bella stumble with him, "'Gooo to hell!'"

Bella snorted, doubling over with laughter.

"Oh, Regulus, you're so much fuun! I'm so glad I asked you!"

Regulus stopped walking, and helped Bella regain her balance.

"What's wrong…?" she asked.

"Bella," he said, slurring his words but sounding perfectly coherent to his date, "I really like you."

"I like you too!"

"No, I mean, I _really_ like you!"

"I reeeeally like you too!"

"I think I'm in love with you!" he blurted, cheeks flushed in the torchlight.

"Huh?"

But suddenly he was kissing her, and it took her a moment to realize it. Not thinking clearly, she allowed him to proceed without protesting. It was rather sloppy, however, and Bella was afraid he'd mess up her makeup.

She pushed him away and said, "Silly boy, let's get into the party!"

"Okay!" he said, apparently forgetting that she hadn't addressed his supposed love profession.

The party was well underway when they arrived. A live band was playing Christmas music, and couples were dancing and milling about at the punch and food tables. The room had a red glow, and firefly-like bugs were flying around flashing green lights. Bella spotted Narcissa dancing with Malfoy, looking like a little princess.

"Let's get some food!" Bella suggested. "I'm really hungry."

Regulus took her hand, and as they went to the tables, Bella scoured the room for Sirius as subtly as possible. She was very aware of how the eyes of many were following her jealously. Bella held her head high and made sure to walk as gracefully as possible.

"Here we are!" Regulus said. "I can get the food for you. What would you like?"

"Some pudding would be nice…" Bella said distractedly.

She had spotted _him. _Sirius was dancing slowly with that blasted Helen Green. They were wrapped in each other's arms. Bella wondered if he had seen her, but that question was banished when his eyes not-so-nonchalantly fell on her. She knew he had seen her—and he was angry.

Bella shot him a snide grin, and took the pudding from Regulus with a warm smile.

"Would you like anything else?" Regulus asked, looking eager to be of service.

"I'd like some cookies, but I don't see any over here…"

"I saw some at the table across the room when we came in. I'll get you some!"

And he was off, rushing to do his crush's will.

"You found a date, I see," a cold voice said.

She found herself face-to-face with Sirius. She was startled at how fast he had come over to her. A few meters back, Helen was rushing to catch up with him.

"It wasn't hard," Bella said coolly, trying to ignore how enticing Sirius was looking in his dress robes. If only he had been her date, and they could have slipped off early... She eyed his lips unintentionally.

"It's not hard when you're going for second-rate."

"Oh, I beg to differ," she said, knowing that staying cool would likely make Sirius more frustrated. "He is definitely _not _second-rate, if you know what I mean. I _guarantee_ it. It seems his type of _quality_ runs in the family..."

A look of horror passed over his face.

Just then, both of their dates arrived. Helen took Sirius' hand, panting and looking put-out.

"Here's your cookies, Bella," Regulus said, purposefully ignoring Sirius.

"Thank you, honey," she smiled sweetly.

It was too much for Sirius.

"You call other girls whores, but you are the biggest whore I have ever met!" he spat.

She cocked an eyebrow, delighting in how agitated he was at the sight of her with his little brother.

"You would know, wouldn't you?" she asked.

"Did you just call my date a whore, Sirius?" Regulus said, looking shocked and furious.

"Well, if the _panty _fits," Sirius said, breaking his staring match with Bella to look her up and down with distaste.

The verbal spar was quickly ended when a fist came from somewhere in Regulus' direction and landed straight on Sirius' nose with a horrible crunch. Blood started squirting everywhere, and Sirius howled in pain. Furious, he ignored the blood that was staining his nice clothes, and leapt at his little brother, who was more than ready for him. The two fell to the floor, doing their best to kill the other.

The dancing and music grinded to a halt as more and more partiers realized there was a fight going on and gathered around. When James Potter realized it was his best friend on the floor, he dove in to help him regardless of Lily Evans' protests.

"What's going on here?" Slughorn bellowed, pushing through the crowd.

"Regulus Black attacked his brother!" Helen exclaimed. "Sirius didn't do anything wrong!"

"So I can call _you_ a whore and it won't be a problem?" Bella said in a low voice that only Helen could hear.

Helen turned on her. "If I was dressed the way you are and reeked of alcohol, you would have every right to call me a whore!"

Bella's teeth bared. She couldn't help herself: she slapped Helen Green. Hard.

The crowd gasped.

"Miss _Black_!" Slughorn gasped, distracted from the brawl on the floor from the sharp sound of the smack.

"Pardon me, Professor," she said, curtseying. "I think I've had enough fun for tonight. Thank you for the lovely party."

With that, she pushed through the crowd and left the stunned teacher to deal with the Black brothers who were brawling on the floor because of her.


	8. Consequence

**) Chapter Eight – Consequence (**

The day after Slughorn's Christmas party, Bella woke up to find that, not only did she have a splitting headache thanks to the firewhiskey, but she was also infamous. Nothing spreads faster than good gossip, and the news that Regulus Black had punched his older brother in defense of his date was the best gossip that Hogwarts had seen since the news that James Potter and Lily Evans had become a couple. Bella found herself laying uselessly in her bed, half hiding from the curious stares and half with the hope that her head would stop pounding.

"Severus Snape is waiting outside for you," Regina said, entering the dorm room. She started taking off her dripping boots.

"Outside where?" Bella grunted from beneath her layers of blankets. The dungeon could be quite cold in winter.

"Outside the entrance to our dorm," Regina replied. "He looks agitated."

"When _isn't_ he agitated?" Bella snorted, and uncovered her head to look at her dorm mate. "And since when do you use words like _agitated_?"

Regina stuck out her tongue at Bella, and after changing into dry clothing, left the room with some textbooks.

Bella dozed off. A short while later, her other dorm mate Vanessa entered.

"Bellatrix? Severus Snape's outside, you know. He wants to see you."

Bella roused from her unpleasant dozing to throw off her covers. She marched out of the dorm room without paying any attention to her bed head or striped nightgown. Snape was in the doorway to her dorm just inside the common room glowering at her, and she strode toward him furiously, looking demented with her tousled hair.

"What do you want, Snape?"

As it was Sunday, a couple of other Slytherins were in the common room studying, and they looked up at her exclamation.

"Guess!" he snapped.

"No, tell me!"

He roughly gripped her arm and pulled her into a corner so no one could overhear them.

"It's bad enough that your magic is worse than useless," Snape hissed, "but parading around like a grand fool at a party, intoxicated and having boys fight over you…"

"Is that what everyone's saying?" Bella asked, feeling proud in spite of the chastisement. "That they were fighting over me?"

"Since when does it matter what people say about you, Bella!" Snape countered. He lowered his voice. "You have lost sight of our goal—to develop our skills so that when we graduate we might serve him! You are frolicking like a foolish girl!"

"For your information, I _am _a girl, and you never used that as an insult on me before!"

"I never had to!"

Bella could do nothing more than glare at him; she knew in her heart that he was right.

Snape sighed. "Bellatrix, I am going to have to report you to your father."

She paled. "You _can't_. You wouldn't!"

If her father heard how she had slacked…she couldn't begin to imagine what punishment he would wreak upon her!

"I can and I would. You seem to have lost sight of what an honor and privilege we have…to become Death Eaters right after school…"

"I'll do better!" Bella said, bordering on desperation.

"You've said that before," Snape pointed out sadly. "I have to report you, Bella. I should have a long time ago. If I had, you might not have strayed so far."

"Snape, _please_," she whispered, as close to begging as she could ever get.

"Your magic hasn't been improving! I have to!"

"I told you, it's not my fault! I can't control it!"

"If you really can't control it, then you should see Pomfrey like I said!"

"I thought you were joking!"

"I wasn't. Go see Pomfrey, Bella, if you are convinced there's something wrong with you. The holidays are coming up, anyway, so your father will know your laxness when he sees you. Use the holidays to get yourself in order, or I will report you in January."

Bella relaxed somewhat. "Thank you, Severus!"

"Then go!" he said. "Today!"

* * *

Bella found herself sitting on a bed in the empty hospital wing, telling Pomfrey all she could about her ailment. Pomfrey took notes as she questioned Bella, looking serious.

"And how long has your magic been irregular?" the nurse asked.

"Off and on for a month, I'd say," Bella replied.

"And what is the weakest you've gotten?"

"The weakest?"

"The least amount of magic you could muster when you tried to do a spell."

Bella thought. A time where she had tried to levitate Sirius' shoe to him after one of their "sessions" came to mind.

"I…tried levitating a shoe. I couldn't even get it off the ground. It was as if I was…I was a Squib…or a—a _Muggle_."

Pomfrey wrote something down. "And what is the most powerful spell you have done?"

That one was easy. "I accidentally blew up a desk."

"A desk."

"Yes, a desk."

"Where was this?"

"Um…after class one time. I wasn't even trying to."

Technically, it _was _after class…and she hadn't been trying to hex the desk…she had been reaching for her wand for another reason...

_It's interesting that my highest fluctuations have been with Sirius_, Bella noted.

Pomfrey wrote something else.

"All right, dearie, I have an idea what it is. It's surprisingly common for girls in your year. I won't say anything until I'm sure, though, so hold your horses and I'll grab a test."

Bella waited for a few minutes, curious about the ailment that could be so common that she had never heard of. Pomfrey returned with tray holding a cup and a parchment. She held out the cup.

"I'll need some of your urine, dear," Pomfrey said.

Bella blinked. "My _what_?"

"You know where the bathroom is from your last stay, I presume," Pomfrey said cheerfully.

Bella nodded, slowly slipped off the bed, and plodded to the bathroom. When she returned, Pomfrey was taking notes.

"Here," Bella said, holding out the half-full cup with a disgusted expression.

Pomfrey took a dropper off the tray and took used it to drop a couple of drops of urine onto the parchment. She watched Pomfrey's expression curiously.

"Well, dearie, I have some good or bad news, depending on how you look at it!"

"What?" Bella asked, relieved that the mystery was solved on the first try. She was excited to have control of her magic again. "What is it?"

"You're going to have a baby!"

It was as if the words went in one ear and out the other. They were utterly incomprehensible.

"_Come_ _again_?"

"You're going to be a mother!"

Pomfrey showed Bella the paper. It was titled, "Mistress Webber's Guaranteed Home Pregnancy Test: Only One Drop Needed!" There was a circle on top, with the words "One Yellow Drop Here, and All Your Questions Answered!" Below the wet circle were the words: "Percentage of Probability of Pregnancy: 98 Percent Certain." The percentage was in green.

"H-_how_?"

"I think you know how, dear," the woman tittered. "That's why your magic is off. The baby is developing its own magic, and it tends to interfere with the mother's magic, making it unpredictable. Some witches don't notice a great change, but most do. I'd advice being very careful with your magic until the baby is born. Your teachers should be notified of the situation, and they will make special accommodations for you."

Bella had no words. There were no words.

Pomfrey patted her shoulder. "Your situation is actually more common than people let on. All girls in your situation are shocked at first, but look on the bright side: you'll be graduated and married to the father before the baby is ever born!"

"I'm not marrying the father!" Bella yelled.

Pomfrey jumped at the outburst. "Why—whyever not?"

"Are you _joking_?" Bella exclaimed. "Me marry the _father_?"

The image was absurd: Bella and Sirius in a shotgun wedding that neither Sirius' friends nor Bella's family attended, with only Bella's huge stomach and a couple of Ministry officials as witnesses. It was so idiotic, Bella started cackling.

"But why wouldn't you marry the father?" the nurse asked confusedly. "This is usually a good opportunity to force the man to marry you!"

"Lady, I am not marrying the father," Bella laughed. "He is an ass!"

"Then why would you engage in such relations…?" the nurse asked, red-faced.

"Because we were careful! We used all the right spells! This wasn't supposed to happen!"

"Dear, even the most advanced spells aren't one hundred percent guaranteed…"

"Evidently! Now how do I get rid of it?"

"Get—get _rid_ of it?"

"Yes. Remove it. Kill it. Whatever. How do I do that?"

"Bellatrix, there is no spell in the wizarding world that has been legalized yet—it is extremely, extremely dangerous…safe methods haven't been established…"

"Muggles have managed to find a way, have they not?"

"Why, yes, but abortions are not encouraged…the Ministry frowns upon witches having them…Muggle medicine and all…"

"Abortions? That's what they're called?" Bella confirmed, slowly reaching into her sweater.

"Yes, yes, abortions. But…"

"Thank you," Bella said, satisfied. She whipped out her wand, and exclaimed, "_Obliviate!"_

Pomfrey's eyes immediately glazed over for a moment. Bella banished the tray, cup, and parchment with a flick of her wand. When Bella was done, Pomfrey blinked confusedly.

"Why, hello there, Miss Black! Why are you here today? Didn't get into another fight with those Gryffindor boys, now, did you?"

"I think I'm coming down with a cold," Bella lied. "May I have a few of those De-coughing Drops?"

"Why, of course!" Pomfrey said happily. "It'll be just a moment…"

* * *

It was a strange isolation that Bella felt as she wandered the halls of Hogwarts, very aware of the abomination that had been growing in her for a month. It was a vicious parasite that had no right to take over her life. Her magic, her most prized part of herself, was being affected. Not only that, her reputation, which she regarded almost as much as her magic, was in danger. If word _ever _got out…

She passed a group of Ravenclaws who were wet, snowy, and laughing heartily at something juvenile. Most were seventh years like Bella. Unlike her, they were still children. Bella was no longer a child; she, in an instant, had become grown up. She now had a taste of the consequences of her actions, and it was a bitter, bitter taste.

"_All packed for the holidays?" _Andromeda's voice came to her. _"Christmas at Grimmauld Place! It'll be so fun with Regulus and his friends—and Mum said Father's even going to be here this year!"_

Bella paused and leaned against the cold stone wall of the passage, looking pained.

_Father. _And_ Mother. _If they ever found out about this, she had no doubt they would put her through the worst Cruciatus Curse she could imagine. She had brought shame upon their family in the worst way: fraternizing not only with a Gryffindor, but a family traitor.

_What was I thinking? _Bella agonized. The victorious feeling of disobeying Druella so blatantly was gone from her. She had played with fire, and had gotten scorched. She had shamed herself, her family, and the cause of Lord Voldemort, the man she had been dying to one day meet and serve. How could she even dare to face him now?

Bella felt a foreign feeling overcome her: a mixture of desperation and anger. No one could know about the thing inside her. It had to go. It didn't deserve to live. She hated it, hated it deeply.

She would find a way to get herself out of this mess, no matter what it took.


	9. Admission

**) Chapter Nine – Admission (**

Bella couldn't have annoyed Sirius more if she had tried. In fact, if she _had _tried, it wouldn't have been nearly as successful.

Ever since Slughorn's party, Sirius had been nothing but hostile toward Bella. His new nickname for her was the "Slytherin Slut," and he took advantage of every opportunity to taunt her in the hallways between classes, in Hogsmeade, at meals, and everywhere in-between.

Bella, however, was infuriatingly impervious to his attempts to upset her. Truthfully, she was unreceptive to most everything in the last days of school before the Christmas holidays. She ate, slept, attended classes, and did her homework…and little else. She was a machine, interacting with other students only when required.

Ironically, Sirius was the only one who noticed her haziness; she had no other close friends who would care. Snape was giving her space to figure out how to control her magic until January. Her sisters were too excited for the break to notice Bella's unresponsiveness.

The truth was that Bella was terrified for the first time in her life. Every waking moment, she was aware of the little urchin that was meddling with her magic. The little brat had no right to be _inside_ her; she wanted it to go burrow up in Sirius' body and see how he liked that!

Feverish nightmares came every night, imagining her parents' reactions, Sirius' reaction, and most terrifying of all, Lord Voldemort's reaction. How the Dark Lord would react when he found out that one of the hand-picked Death Eater trainees was pregnant with the child of a blood traitor, she had no idea. She had never even met the Lord. But she was certain that he would punish her severely…if he didn't kill her.

Bella was still certain that she had to find a way to get rid of the baby. She had been sneaking in the Restricted Section looking for abortion books, and had found one that alluded to it, which led her to find another. The scary-looking book warned that the spell was extremely dangerous (as Pomfrey had warned her) and could only be correctly performed by another person besides the mother. And who did she have to do it for her? No one.

* * *

She soon found herself on the Hogwarts Express headed back to London, no closer to a resolution than she had been when she had found out about the problem. She stared out of the window of the cabin dismally as her sisters contemplated what their parents might have bought them from Diagon Alley.

The door to their compartment slid open to reveal Regulus.

"There you are, Bella!" Regulus said in a high-pitched voice.

"Yes?" she said.

"Uh...might I have a quick word?" he asked, gesturing out into the hallway.

Bella shrugged and rose from her seat. When she was outside the compartment, Regulus slid the door shut behind them. The hall was deserted.

Regulus cleared his throat. "I was hoping we could, um, talk about what happened. It's been hard to find you these days, so I hope you haven't thought I was uninterested or anything..."

"What are you talking about?" Bella asked, confused.

His eyes darted nervously. "You know...in the hallway that time..."

She raised her eyebrows questioningly.

"When we, um," he lowered his voice, "_kissed_."

"Oh _that!_" she exclaimed, chuckling. "What about it?"

"I was hoping that we could clear up the air about what we are before we get to my house and see our parents," he said, his dark eyes looking hopeful.

"And what _are_ we?"

"Well, I'd like for us to go steady," he volunteered. His cheeks were red. "As I said, I like you a lot, Bella."

Bella was taken aback at his honestly and forthrightness. "Oh! Wow. I—uh—appreciate that a lot!"

"Then you think we should, you know, spread the word…?"

She sighed. She didn't like Regulus _that _way, but she knew that she could grow to. He was handsome like Sirius. A match with him would make her parents thrilled. However, she knew that now was _not _the time to be entering into a relationship with anyone. She had to figure out what she was going to do about the spawn; a boyfriend would not react well to finding out his girlfriend was pregnant—especially if the father was his own brother!

"Regulus, I like you a lot, but…now is _really _not a good time for me. I only have a half a year left, and you know…"

Regulus' expression fell, and he pulled back. "I see."

"Truly, it has nothing to do with you…"

"Is there someone else?" he asked coldly.

"No, there really isn't."

"That's a shame," he said flatly. "It would have made your rejection a whole lot easier. Now I know that you just think you're too good for me."

"That's not true!"

"Don't even bother, Bella," he scoffed, shaking his head. He took a few steps back, studying her with new eyes. "You know, I never thought I'd say this, but I actually think Sirius is right about you. You are a slut."

Bella's jaw dropped in shock. "_Excuse_ me?"

"You led me on only to drop me later...who else have you been snogging, Bella? The whole rest of the seventh year? Oh, wait—you must be done with the seventh year if you've moved down to my year!"

She was too taken aback by his scorn that she couldn't think of anything witty to say. "That's completely unfair! You kissed _me_!"

"But you sure didn't protest, did you? You could have said you weren't interested then, before I fought Sirius for your honor!"

"My honor?" Bella laughed. "Please—I don't need someone like you fighting for my 'honor.' I can do my own fighting, thanks."

"As I said: a stuck-up slut," he said with a curled lip. "I'll see you in London."

With that he wheeled around and stalked down the hall.

"I can't wait!" Bella retorted.

He didn't respond, but went to the next train car with a bang of the sliding door.

Bella stood there, not wishing to go back and see her sisters. The silence of the hall was much more enjoyable; all she could hear was the low murmurings from the cabins. The train was chugging through a forest, and the sky was already darkening.

She had the urge to find Sirius and curse him to hell. The bastard had not only gotten her pregnant, but he was ruining all of the other possible healthy relationships she could have had with other boys! On top of that, he was marching around with that bitch Helen Green as if their bodies were incapable of separating. He was completely oblivious that he was a father.

The unfairness of the situation infuriated her. She was the one who would bear the brunt of her family's anger, not him. She was the one who would be taunted and whispered about. Sirius was protected because it would be worse for Bella if her family knew about his involvement.

_That bastard! _she growled through gritted teeth. She gripped the windowsill until her knuckles were white, wishing it was the fool's neck.

As if on cue, a couple ducked out of a compartment at the other end of the train car. Bella ignored them out of principle, but couldn't help but react when she heard the hideous slurping sounds of their kissing.

She turned to then and exclaimed, "Do you _mind_?" ready to lash out at anything in her path.

The boy had pinned the girl to the window, but both pulled away just enough to look at her.

Bella was horrified to realize that it wasn't just any couple: it was Sirius and Helen. Her hands were raking his dark hair just as Bella once had, and his hands were gripping her sides just as he had once held Bella's. Shaking with fury, Bella strove to look as calm as possible.

"I'm sorry," Bella said calmly. "I'll leave. Please continue."

She made to go back into the compartment, but Sirius' voice stopped her.

"Bella—wait," he said.

She looked back. Helen frowned at him as he let go of her, puzzled.

"Honey, go back in with the others," Sirius said to Helen. "I'll be in in a bit."

Helen reluctantly nodded, and with a curious glance at Bella went into the compartment. Sirius and Bella studied each other across the train car hallway. She swallowed as Sirius slowly walked toward her.

She loathed herself for it, but when she looked into those grey eyes in that handsome face, all she wanted was for him to take her in his arms and kiss her like he had just kissed that Gryffindor bitch. And more.

Bella kept her expression as cool as possible. "What do you want, Sirius?"

He stopped. "I...I don't know. You looked like you needed to talk."

"And Mr. Gryffindor suddenly wants to talk to the Slytherin Slut, does he?" she spat.

He avoided her gaze, scratching his hair uncomfortably. "Uh, yeah..." He shrugged. "I had to do that, you know. To save face and all."

He looked back up at her, and she didn't look away. There was something about looking at him again so close, so alone, that made Bella want to tell him the truth. Maybe he could make everything all right. Maybe they could be happy together and start a little family...?

"Sirius...I'm pregnant."

Bella froze after the words escaped. She hadn't meant to actually _say _it!

She waited with bated breath for his reaction. How Sirius reacted would determine what she did...would perhaps determine the rest of her life.

He didn't react at first. When the words sank in, his eyes bugged in shock.

"Pregnant, huh?" he said, sounding strangely casual. "Who's the father?"

Tears sprang to Bella's eyes. She couldn't imagine anything more hurtful for him to have said.

"The father?" she hissed. "Who do you think, idiot?"

"How do you expect me to know? We did, you know, a lot, but there wasn't any understanding that we'd be exclusive."

"What are you telling me? That you think I was with other boys besides you?"

"You weren't?" he asked, looking surprised.

"No!" she cried. Then it hit her: if he thought she was with other boys, then…

"Were you with other girls, Sirius?"

He looked anywhere but at her, his guilty expression saying all he needed to. "We didn't—I mean—yeah, but—"

Bella cursed her own naivety.

Her expression must have been frightful, because Sirius hurried to say, "It wasn't much, Bella, really! I mean, you and I were at it so much that I couldn't. I wasn't going to, either, it's just that Helen was wondering why I hadn't asked her to, you know, and I had to or else she would have caught on…"

"Don't worry, Sirius, I understand! I get that the idea of admitting that you were with me was so scary that you had to shag another girl to prove your manliness!"

"Don't turn this on me, Bella!" he snapped. "You didn't want anyone knowing about us any more than I did!"

"Is that so? Did you ever take the time to ask?"

Just then the door at the end of the car opened, letting in the noise from the tracks. The candy trolley rolled in.

The old lady pushing it smiled at them. "Anything for you, lovies?"

Bella snorted so only Sirius could hear. "Only a baby."

Without waiting for Sirius' reaction, she went into her sisters' compartment, shutting the door firmly behind her.


	10. Family

**) Chapter Ten - Family (**

"So, Cissy dear, how was the start of your third year?" Walburga asked, handing the peas to her husband.

Bella's and Sirius' whole families were gathered for dinner at Number Twelve Grimmauld Place, eating in the grand, dark dining room. The Hogwarts Express had arrived that evening, and Kreacher had a wonderful meal waiting for them when they arrived. Everyone except Sirius was there, for obvious reasons; this was the first holiday break he wouldn't make an appearance, but his absence wasn't remarked upon. Even Bella's quiet father Cygnus was there, as was Sirius' handsome father Orion; Cygnus, as a Death Eater, was often gone on the Dark Lord's business, and Orion was a high-level Ministry official who worked constantly.

"It was all right, Aunt Walburga," Narcissa replied dutifully, eating daintily.

Andromeda smirked as she forked the breaded pork into her mouth. "Cissy went to Professor Slughorn's Christmas ball! Lucius Malfoy asked her."

At this, all of the adults at the table stopped and looked at Narcissa in surprise.

"You did, daughter?" Druella asked, looking surprised and impressed. "You went with Lucius Malfoy?"

Narcissa blushed and glanced at Bella, who nodded at her encouragingly across the table.

"Yes," Narcissa answered, looking at the adults for their reactions.

The women raised their eyebrows and looked at each other. Bella could see the wheels turning for a pureblood match already.

"Isn't Lucius in Reggie's year?" Orion asked, smiling at his only remaining son who looked like a younger version of him.

Regulus nodded jollily, his mouth full. Bella avoided looking at him; things had been very strained between them since their _conversation _on the Hogwarts Express that afternoon. She had not forgiven him for calling her a slut, and knew she never would.

"Well done, Narcissa," Cygnus praised his youngest daughter in a rare display of approval.

The blonde girl reddened with pleasure, not seeming to completely understand the conversation within the conversation. "Bella and Regulus also went to Slughorn's ball!" she offered.

The adults once again looked interested.

"Oh?" Druella asked. "And who did you go with, daughter?"

Bella had pointedly started drinking from her goblet when her mother started speaking, so she was spared from answering. She did, however, chance a glance at Regulus, who was looking uncomfortable at the question. Andromeda spoke, looking smug.

"Bella and Regulus went together. It was the talk of the whole school for a week!"

There was complete silence at the table. Bella was the only one picking at her food, for she could not look up. Her back was straight and her expression passive.

Druella broke the shocked silence by saying, "To think, 'Burga, we've been turning ourselves grey trying to come up with a solution, and it's sitting before our eyes!"

"Indeed!"

Bella looked up. "A solution for what?"

"Who you should marry when you graduate, of course!" Druella said.

"Yes, Bella," Andromeda interjected, "the pure Black line _must_ continue."

Missing her daughter's sarcasm, Druella nodded. "Exactly. And since your _last_ prospect is no longer available, we've taken it upon ourselves to secure a match."

"Unfortunately, pureblood males are hard to come by these days," Walburga added. "We were fearing for your options."

Bella's wide eyes locked with Regulus'. She saw her same horror reflected in him. Their mothers wanted them to _marry!_

"Mum," Regulus quickly, "I'm not so sure this is a good idea. I've still got another year of school after this—"

"He's right," Bella added. "I don't think—"

"Tut, tut," Orion said amusedly. "There's no need to get worked up!"

"Nothing's been arranged," Walburga added.

But Bella's aunt and mother locked eyes and winked. Nothing had been arranged..._yet._

* * *

When dinner was over, both Regulus and Bella bolted, choosing not to partake in the family gossip around the fire. Regulus firmly locked himself in his room without a word when they reached the first landing. Bella meandered down the hall, not tired enough for bed and unsure what to do.

_I should be performing _Termino Fetusium_ on myself, _she thought, wishing she had done the Abortive Spell before she had left Hogwarts. The book may have said it was too dangerous to perform on herself, but it was worth the try. After all, she was normally a stellar witch, and magic had advanced since the book had been written….

Determined to finally get rid of Sirius' spawn, she straightened her shoulders and marched down the hallway, ready to find a secluded room where no one would hear if she screamed from pain.

Then suddenly she stopped short. The door to the right had caught her eye. The sign on it read "Sirius." Surprised to see that her aunt and uncle hadn't removed the plaque, curiosity led her to reach for the knob and turn it. It wasn't locked, and with a pounding heart she entered the messy room that apparently hadn't been touched since Sirius had been there last summer.

It was very spacious, with a chandelier and a large four-poster bed. The walls were plastered with Quidditch posters and pictures with his friends. Bella stopped in front of one picture with Sirius and his three best friends smiling up and her, looking happy and utterly full of themselves, messing up each other's hair.

Her lip twisted with scorn. She pulled out her wand and sent a curse flying at the photograph; the curse bounced off of it harmlessly and hit the bed, burning into the messy quilt atop it.

Bella suddenly understood why her relatives hadn't cleaned up the room; Sirius had made it damn near impossible to remove his things.

Snorting, her eyes trailed over the wall as she slowly wandered over to the bed. Her eyes fell upon Muggle posters of nearly-naked women with impossibly perfect bodies.

Irrational anger boiled up in Bella as she was reminded of how much she resented and _hated _Sirius...and most of all how she hated herself. She had allowed herself to think that there was something special between her and her cousin, and that he was only putting on a show with the other girls. In reality, Sirius had no more regard for her than any other person—and no doubt much less now that she had shown her vulnerability and had been foolish enough to—what? Care for him? Had she cared for him? Had she loved him?

_You loved him, _her thoughts taunted her. _You loved him, even though you knew better. _

"This will end here," she whispered, and shoving away her thoughts, she pointed her wand at the door and locked it. She then performed a Muffliato charm on the room to cover up any sounds.

Taking in a deep breath, she went before the mirror in the wooden wardrobe and unbuttoned the top of her pants. She rolled up her shirt, leaving her still-flat stomach exposed. She raised her wand, but hesitated. Would it be better if she lay down?

She quickly went over and hopped onto the bed, which had the faint, tantalizingly familiar smell of her former lover. Hate swelled through her, and she replayed the steps of the Abortive Curse in her mind, which she had read so many times.

_1: Visualize the fetus. _

There had been a picture in the book to give her an idea of what she was supposed to be thinking of. It had looked like a deformed baby.

_2: Place the tip of your wand in the umbilicus. _

It was rather awkward and terrifying to be pointing the wand directly at her belly button.

_3: Utter the incantation _Termino Fetusium_. _

Bella swallowed and closed her eyes. She opened her mouth to speak when there was the sound of a small pop and—

"Mistress Bella?"

Shocked, Bella put her wand aside and sat up. Kreacher was at the side of the bed.

She blinked. "Yes?"

"Your parents request your presence in Master Orion's study," he bowed.

"Oh." She was too stunned to care that she wasn't completely buttoned up; Kreacher was only a house-elf, anyway.

"Shall I tell them you're coming, Miss Bella?" he asked eagerly.

"Uh—yes."

Kreacher disappeared with another pop, and Bella slowly lay back down on the bed. She stared at the ceiling.

A moment later, she rose and fixed herself up, determined that she would finish what she had started later. At least now she _knew _that she had the courage to do it. Now she just had to find a place where she couldn't be interrupted!

She made her way downstairs, past where Orion was playing checkers with Andromeda in the living room. She knocked on the study and entered, finding her father and mother leaned against the front of the large mahogany desk in close conversation. They stopped as Bella approached.

"You asked to see me?"

"Yes, Bellatrix, please have a seat," Cygnus said, indicating towards the seats in front of the desk. Bella obeyed as he continued. "You know how I like to get an update on your studies every once in a while—"

"Oh, school's going great!" Bella assured him.

He smiled, which was a rare sight for him. "As I have no doubt. You have never had anything less than stellar grades. I would like to receive an update on your..._extracurricular..._progress that I may relay to the Dark Lord when I see him." He held up a parchment. "I have word from your partner Severus Snape on what you have been working on, but I would like to hear your own account."

Bella gripped her chair at the mention that Snape had written her father. Snape hadn't mentioned her slacking, had he? He had promised he wouldn't yet, and there was no trace of suspicion on her parents' faces, so she relaxed.

"Well, we've mastered the Imperius Curse, Cruciatus Curse, and Avada Kedavra on small animals—the only things we could use without raising suspicion," Bella said. "Snape's perfecting _Sectumsempra, _and we're close to figuring out a counter-spell for it—"

"Yes, yes, you told me all this last summer. What new things have you been working on? Have you been able to uncover any useful spells in the Restricted Section of the library or come up with any of your own?"

"I—um," Bella faltered, "Uh, well...I've mastered _Serpensortia _and we've gotten really good at Shield Charms..."

Druella stood up, brow furrowed in concern. She glanced at her husband before asking softly, "Daughter, has your magic been irregular lately?"

Bella froze.

Her mother _knew! _After what Pomfrey told her about the cause of her irregularities, there was no doubt her mother was an expert on the subject, what with having three children.

"Uh—I—um..." she stuttered, trying to buy time.

She had to choices: to lie, in which case it would be easy for her parents to prove otherwise if Snape or someone else that knew her even a little could expose it. Or she could tell the truth, in which case there would be a whole host of follow-up questions and answers that she wasn't ready to face.

_If only I had performed the Abortive Spell sooner! _she lamented furiously. It would have been so much easier to deal with her parents' questions if the issue was already dealt with.

"Daughter?" Cygnus pressed.

"Uh...yes, yes...My magic has been a little unpredictable."

Druella gave Cygnus a knowing look, as if she had just proved a point to him. With bright eyes, she knelt beside Bella.

"Dear, are you expecting?"

"Expecting?" Bella repeated dumbly, unnerved by her mother's loving tone.

"A baby?"

"A baby," Bella repeated, eyes flickering between her parents.

They both nodded, leaning forward. To Bella's puzzlement, they didn't seem on the verge of fury; they seemed almost excited as if they were about to hear if their Quidditch team won the World Cup.

"What makes you think I'm having a baby?

"Bella, please," Druella said. "You have the look, and the way you were acting at dinner..."

There was a silent pause.

"Yeeeees..." Bella said, taking the risk. She braced herself.

Druella released her breath. She stood and looked to Cygnus triumphantly. "I told you, dear!" She clasped her hands together. "Oh, this is very good."

Bella's eyes bulged. "_Good_?"

"Now we have to go forward with the wedding!" she said. "Walburga has been eying some other girls for Regulus, but now she'll have no choice."

"We—wedding?"

"Yes, _wedding_,_" _Druella said in a patronizing tone of voice.

"To who?"

Her parents frowned at each other confusedly.

"Why, to Regulus, of course," Cygnus said. "Who else?"

"Why would he want to marry me?" she laughed.

"Because you're having his baby!" Druella said, starting to look worried at Bella's confusion.

Bella stared at them. "You think Regulus is the father?"

Cygnus leapt to his feet. "You're telling us he _isn't_?"

"Of course he isn't!" Bella exclaimed, standing up. "Why in the world did you think he was?"

"You went to the ball with him!" Cygnus pointed out.

"And the way you were looking at each other at dinner—I was sure you were both just worried about how to tell us!" Druella said.

"No, no, no," Bella said firmly. "_No."_

"Then who is the father?" Cygnus demanded. "Is he pureblood?"

"Of course!" Bella exclaimed. "You think I would let a Mudblood touch me?"

"Then who is it?" Druella cried.

Bella faltered. She had been so worked up by her shock at first her parents' knowledge of her condition and then their thinking she would marry Regulus that she had almost forgotten the thing she could never tell them: who the father _really_ was.

When Bella didn't answer, Druella pressed: "You do know, _don't_ _you_?"

"Yes!" Bella snapped, but turned away and walked to the window.

"Bella..." Cygnus said in a warning voice.

Druella inhaled resignedly. "Kreacher!"

Kreacher apparated into the room. "Yes, Mistress Druella?"

"Get me that tea I asked for."

"Yes, Mistress." The house-elf was gone with a pop.

"It looks like we have a long night ahead of us," Druella said to Bella's back. "But make no mistake, you _will _tell us who the father is."


	11. Veritaserum

**) Chapter Eleven – Veritaserum (**

After Kreacher disapparated, Bella continued to stare out the window, her mind racing.

She simply could _not _tell her parents that Sirius was the father. Her mother had made her promise never to associate with Sirius ever again, and this was much, _much_ more than just mere association. She had hopped into bed with him, figuratively _and _literally.

Could she lie? Could she blame it on another student? It would only backfire in the end, because her parents would try to force her to marry the unfortunate chosen target, who would vehemently deny that he was the father. The truth would come out eventually, only after a big scandal.

She simply _couldn't_ answer them.

"Bellatrix," her father's disarmingly calm voice said warningly, "this will be much simpler if you just answer this straight out."

Bella ignored him. She heard the small pop of Kreacher re-entering the room.

"Come have some tea, dear," Druella said in a strange tone.

Bella turned suspiciously, arms crossed. Cygnus and Druella took their tea from the house-elf, sipping it with dubious calm. Kreacher stepped in front of Bella, holding up the cup for her with wide eyes. She took it from him slowly, and he disapparated.

"Drink, Bella," Druella said impatiently.

Eyeing her parents, Bella sniffed it. There was no strange odor.

"Why?" she asked.

"It'll calm you down while we chat," Druella said, making hurried circles with her hands. "Now have a sip and sit back down."

"No," Bella said flatly. "There's Veritaserum in here, isn't there?"

Druella glanced at Cygnus. "Of course not, dear. Stop being so distrustful."

Bella snorted and strode over to her. "Fine. Then have my tea, and I'll have yours!" She held out her cup.

"Don't be silly, Bella, my germs are on this one!"

Triumphant that she was right in her guess, Bella was about to defiantly throw the cup onto the carpet when suddenly—

"_Imperius_!"

At her father's voice, Bella immediately lost control of her body. Her mind started clouding as she lifted the cup to her lips under the direction of Cygnus' wand. Her mouth unwillingly opened, and she poured the liquid clumsily into her mouth, sloshing the hot tea on her sweater.

_Merlin, no! _she thought desperately. She panicked as she swallowed, scalding her throat, and knew it was all lost unless she could throw off the curse.

She mustered all the power she could. _Think of Sirius, think of Sirius, _she told herself. The anger that poured through her made her quiver, but did not break the enchantment. As she unwillingly drank, she tried to remember any manner of throwing off an Unforgivable Curse; she couldn't think of one!

Knowing that every second she tarried was another second closer to her spilling all of her secrets, she thought of the spawn: the parasite had made her magic unpredictable, but it also made her extremely powerful at times. Concentrating hard as she ingested the last drops of tea, she concentrated on channeling the baby's energy, focusing on it, then merging it with her own.

With a lurch that threw her to the ground, the _Imperius_ spell broke. Now in control of her limbs, she threw the cup at her father, who ducked. As the cup shattered on the far wall, Druella pulled out her wand.

"_Immobulus_!" Druella cried, pointed her wand at her daughter.

Bella rolled out of the way, and the curse collided with a couch. She had one goal in mind: get out of there before her parents had any chance of asking her any questions, because she couldn't lie to them!

Just as her father was sending a spell at her, she twisted and disapparated out of the room. She apparated into the foyer; it was impossible to apparate in or out of Grimmauld Place. She heard her parents' yells coming closer as she broke into a run. Without thinking to grab a coat, she burst out into the dark, freezing night. A spell whizzed by her and made a small explosion in the snow. Once she had leapt off the front step, she twisted in air with one thought in mind: Spinner's End.

If there was one person who could help her, it would be Snape.

* * *

She appeared in the middle of a street next to a large factory. Small brick houses were all around—but which one was Snape's? She had never been here before, and couldn't even remember how she knew he lived on a street called Spinner's End. Perhaps she had been mistaken...?

She shuddered from the cold as she turned in a slow circle, studying each house for a hint that a wizard might live there. It was long past dinner, and most of the lights were out in the houses. The lone streetlight flickered. There were dirty toys tossed about the yards, along with abandoned furniture. Bella's lip curled. These Muggles didn't even have the sense to clean up after themselves!

Muffled yelling from the house at the end of the street caught her attention. She moved toward that home curiously. The houses' walls must have been quite thin, for it wasn't hard for Bella to catch what was going on from standing in their front sidewalk.

"...Why you let that boy play with potions, I'd like to someday understand!" a man's rough voice yelled. She could see his outlined shadow against the dirty shade of the front window. "Utterly useless! He should be doing some real work..."

"Honey, Severus is very good at what he does. He didn't mean to burn through the bathtub, it just happened..."

"Then he'd better find a way to grow a new tub, because he's paying for it!"

Amazed at her luck at finding Snape's house, Bella worriedly opened the creaky front gate. She wrapped her arms around herself as she went to the front step and knocked on the door.

The yelling stopped. A moment later, the door cracked open. A dark-haired, foul-smelling man peered out angrily.

"What do you want?" he demanded.

"I—I need to see Snape—Severus, I mean," Bella said, hoping he didn't ask her why. If he did, the Veritaserum would prompt her to tell him the whole story!

"Who is it, Tobias?" a woman's voice asked.

"Some girl," Tobias said, eying her up and down.

Bella wanted to glare at him, but thought better of it if she wanted to be let in. A pale woman peeked around him to get a look at Bella. Her eyebrows lifted when she saw Bella.

"You're a Black, aren't you?" she asked, looking surprised.

Impressed and pleased that Snape's mother knew of her family, Bella nodded.

"Do come in, do come in!" she said.

"But, Eileen—" Tobias started.

Eileen shook her head quickly. "Very powerful wizarding family," she said warningly.

Tobias' eyes flashed with disgust and fear, but he stepped back for Bella to come in. Their house was small and grimy. A very old television sat in the corner with bent antennae hovering above it.

Before they had a chance to ask her anything, Bella asked, "Is Severus here? I must see him at once."

"Is he in trouble?" Tobias asked. "That boy—"

"No, sir!" Bella assured him. "I am!" She had not wanted to say that last part, but the Veritaserum forced it from her.

"He's up in his room. I'll call him down," Eileen said.

"No, that won't be necessary!" Bella said quickly. "I can just go up."

The parents looked unsure, but Eileen said, "Top of the stairs, first door on the right."

Bella thanked them and rushed up the rickety stairs. Snape's door had nothing on it save for some marks that looked scarily like someone had been kicking it brutally. She knocked on it quickly.

Snape opened it. His jaw dropped. "Bella! What...what are you _doing_ here?" He was wearing baggy, faded clothing that she had never seen him wear at school.

"I need you to perform _Termino_ _Fetusium_ on me_,_" she blurted, marching into the surprisingly neat room.

"_Excuse_ me?" He closed the door behind her. She had never seen Snape genuinely shocked, but he was so now. His beady eyes bulged at her.

"I'm pregnant, and I need you to get rid of it. Preferably this instant! I just barely escaped Grimmauld Place without telling my parents everything."

"Everything _what_?"

The Veritaserum made it so easy to divulge what would have been a huge struggle otherwise.

"I'm having Sirius Black's baby."

"What?" He suddenly looked suspicious. "Hey—is this some kind of prank? What form does your Boggart take?"

"My Boggart is me as a Squib," she sighed, anxious to get past the questions. "And no, this is _not _a prank! What do you think I am, Potter in disguise?"

Snape still stared at her in shock, but didn't look as suspicious. "Something like that. But come on, Bella—you _pregnant_? With that bastard's...bastard?"

She glared at him. "Will you help me or not?"

"Why do you need my help? Can't you just do the curse yourself?"

"I tried, but my parents interrupted. They forced me to drink Veritaserum, and I'm a little too riled up to be performing complex magic like this! Can you please just do it for me so this can all be over? I don't want Sirius leveraging this against me!"

"How can he use it against you unless he knows?" At Bella's guilty expression, Snape's jaw dropped. "You _told _him?"

"I...had a moment of...weakness..."

"How about a whole _term_ of weakness? What were you thinking becoming involved with him?" he snapped. "Have you any idea the power he has over you now? He could make you the joke of the school!"

"Don't you think I'm aware of that?" she screeched. "Why do you think I want to get rid of the baby so badly?"

A knock sounded on the door, and Snape's mother peeked in. "Severus, your father is going to bed now, and I advise you to keep noise to a minimum..."

Snape nodded. "Okay, Mum."

"I won't be here long, Mrs. Snape," Bella said politely.

"Oh, don't worry about it!" Eileen quickly assured her. "Severus has never brought a girl over before, especially someone with a family as renowned as yours! Stay as long as you want!"

She shut the door behind her softly. Snape's cheeks were burning as he waved his wand at the walls, muttering _"Muffliato." _Bella could see she had the upper hand now, thanks to his mother.

"Now will you help me or not?" she asked, hands on her hips.

"Bella, the Abortive Curse is highly dangerous. There's a reason why it's illegal!"

"What other option do you see? I'm not having this baby, Snape. I _can't._"

He studied her, his eyes hard and thoughtful. "Tell me what to do."

She glanced about the room, spotted the dirty-but-made bed, and lay down upon it. She hiked up her top. "Point your wand here, picture what it looks like, and say the Curse." She looked over at him.

With trepidation, Snape went over and pointed his wand at her belly button. "I don't like this, Bella..."

"Do it," she said. "Do it or I will never be a Death Eater, and all of our time and studying will be a complete waste. Do it, or the Dark Lord may wonder why you were so oblivious to what I was doing."

"Don't turn this on me, Bellatrix Black!"

"I'm just saying what might happen! Just do it and everything will be all right!"

He hesitated.

"Do you want me to _beg, _Snape?"

"Might make it more enjoyable," he sneered, but positioned himself for the kill.

Bella closed her eyes. She knew what might happen. The books had mentioned the possible effects of the Curse.

"_Termino Fetusium!"_

The sound of a small explosion filled the room, and a blinding, shocking pain that almost made Bella pass out filled her abdomen. Bella screamed and Snape shielded his face as they were instantly covered in blood and tissue. Still screaming in agony, Bella looked down: her stomach had been blasted open. She could see the flesh blown back, and pieces of organs swimming in the pooling blood. She swayed on the edge of consciousness, dizzy from the horrific sight.

Snape, wiping the blood from face, instantly started muttering healing enchantments over her. Bella moaned, wishing she could just die. The pain was intolerable. She was losing too much blood...

"This is too much for me, Bella!" Snape yelled. "I need help!"

Bella couldn't reply.

"I have to go get help!"

"No..." she managed to gasp. "Don't leave me..."

"It's your only chance. This is too serious—you need someone powerful enough!"

Bella no longer had the strength to scream. Numbness was taking over. She heard a pop, and when she opened her eyes, she saw that Snape had left her.

She was alone in Snape's bedroom on the verge of death, all because she had let herself fall for a jerk named Sirius Black.


	12. Voldemort

**) Chapter Twelve - Voldemort (**

"Awaken, Bellatrix."

The soft order brought Bella from the darkness of unconsciousness. Her eyes flickered, finding herself in an indistinct dark place. She was lying on a hard, dirty, stone floor. A lone candle flickered on the floor to her left, the light not reaching the edges of the chamber, which faded into blackness.

She moved slowly and was surprised to feel no pain. She slowly sat up and pulled up her shirt. She was shocked to see a ghastly pink, thick, and puckering scar that spread from below her navel up to her rib cage. Both horrified at the scar and relieved that she was healed, she looked around in the darkness.

Suddenly, a tall male figure emerged from the darkness to her right. As the candlelight fell on his pale face and slitted red eyes that she had only ever heard of, shock and fear overcame her. She threw herself onto her hands and knees.

"My _Lord_!"

"Bellatrix." Her name was barely a whisper from his thin lips.

She shivered in fear, her hair almost brushing his feet. "My Lord, why—how—?"

"Isn't it obvious, Bellatrix?" he said quietly.

"Snape brought me here!" She looked up at his white face. "He brought me to you?"

"No other has the power that Lord Voldemort has to mend the effects of an Abortive Curse. But rest assured, Bellatrix, Sirius Black's progeny is dead."

Bella let out a wail and buried her face in the ground. He knew everything! She had always imagined meeting Voldemort face-to-face as a Hogwarts graduate, top of her class and with lots of knowledge and experience in Dark spells. To meet him the most degraded state imaginable was intolerable.

"My Lord, spare me the humiliation and kill me now!" she whimpered tearfully. "You know what a traitor I have been—soon everyone will know and my family will be eternally shamed. Please—end the torment!"

"Bellatrix. Rise. Dry your tears."

Surprised, she crawled to her feet and wiped her face. She couldn't meet his eyes.

"Did you think any of this was a surprise to Lord Voldemort?" he asked.

Her wide eyes darted up to meet his. His face was unreadable in the flickering light.

"Did you think I wouldn't keep an eye on you, Bellatrix?"

"Me, my Lord? I am nobody!"

"Nobody? You call a hand-picked protégé destined to be a part of my closest circle of allies nobody?"

Bella had no reply.

"Oh, yes, Bellatrix. I have had you and Severus Snape observed. There is _very_ little that Lord Voldemort doesn't know."

"But, my Lord, if you know about me and—and Sirius Black, why didn't you stop me?"

He arched an eyebrow. "Didn't stop you? Your own mother forbade you from speaking to him."

"But…but she's my mother! She's always telling me what to do!"

"You didn't think there was anything unusually…_pressing_…about how she asked you?"

Bella's mouth went dry. "_You _had her order me not to speak to Sirius?"

"Indirectly. I have observed you, Bellatrix. I choose my Death Eaters carefully. You had the makings of a great follower, but you had one flaw: You tend to do the opposite of what authority wants of you. You flirt on the edges of what is allowed. It is a good trait for one who is to serve Lord Voldemort, but it does make one wonder if you might decide that my orders were optional."

"And so you had Mother ask me not to speak to Sirius to tempt me?"

"It was a test, Bellatrix."

She hung her head. "And I failed. Miserably!"

"On the contrary. You have done nothing that I didn't want you to do."

"My Lord?"

"Bellatrix, you had a Memory Charm placed on you at the beginning of this term."

She nodded, not understanding at the sharp turn the conversation had taken.

"You heard something you weren't supposed to that day on the Hogwarts Express." He paused. "Sirius Black lamented that you were a Slytherin, because he had always been glad you had been betrothed."

Bella's mouth dropped. "And he cursed me because I overheard that? What a bastard!"

"Is that not in his very character? It shows how much those sentiments meant to him that he would go to such lengths to erase them from your mind."

"Are…are you telling me that Sirius liked me before this year?"

"Just this year, Bellatrix?" Voldemort's mouth curved into a smirk, as if the whole situation were somehow amusing to him. "He has had feelings for you since childhood."

"How do you _know _this?"

"Who am I, Bellatrix?"

Bella bowed her head in acknowledgement.

"My lord, why are you telling me this?"

"Lord Voldemort needs to know what you are going to do with this information. What does it mean to you that the boy you have fallen in love with has cared for you just as much, if not more?"

Her face contorted in rage. "How do I feel? It makes me want to kill him even more! He put me through hell…It was one thing if he didn't care about me, but—but loving me and doing that to me…"

Voldemort's eyes flashed victoriously. "Then you have learned your lesson, Bella. You have passed the test. You have learned the uselessness of love. You have seen the inferiority of blood-traitors. You have shown that you will do anything to get what you want, even risking your own safety. You will serve Lord Voldemort greatly."

She dropped to her knees, hands clasped over her heart. "I am yours, My Lord! You have saved my life: my life is yours!"

His red eyes glowed as he looked down at her and whispered, "And that is your value. You are _mine_."

"What would you have me do, my Lord?" she asked with shining eyes.

"You will finish your education. You will study with Severus Snape and perfect your skills."

"What of my family? I must have been gone for days!"

"You will return to them until the end of the holidays. They have not yet sent out word of your disappearance because of pride. You will return."

"What shall I tell them? If they knew about Sirius..."

"A memory modification would work just as well as speaking, Bellatrix."

Her heart leapt with relief. "May I, my Lord?"

"I would not mention it if you could not. Now you must go."

Bella was disappointed at the idea of leaving him. "Must I, my Lord? Can I not stay with you instead?"

"Some day, Bellatrix, perhaps. First, you must clean up your loose ends. You must carefully...assist...your family with their memories and..."

"...And deal with Sirius?" she finished, standing up.

He nodded.

"But I _may_ stay with you someday, my Lord?" she pressed.

"Perhaps."

She didn't think it fitting to leave without expressing her deep gratitude one more time.

"My Lord...I cannot thank you enough. You have restored me my dignity, my family, and my life. I...I don't deserve it. Thank you."

"Just never forget the service I have done you, Bellatrix."

Bella nodded, placing her hand on her heart.

"I am yours, my Lord. I am yours forever."


	13. Memory

**) Chapter Thirteen – Memory (**

It was with a sense of calm that Bella returned to Hogwarts after the Christmas holidays. Her foolish actions from the fall were close to being erased: her parents had no inkling that Bella had ever been pregnant, and her whole family now had no recollection of Bella missing for nearly a week.

The rest of the holidays had been a breeze, with Bella finding herself unable to forget the service that Voldemort had done her. Her meeting with him was surreal, too good to believe. She couldn't forget the soft, whispery sound of his voice and the power that emanated from him. There was truly none to match to the Dark Lord. That he had chosen her to be a Death Eater was an honor that she couldn't begin to feel worthy of, especially now that she had failed her test so miserably. She had taken the gravity of her appointment for granted when she had become distracted by Sirius; she would never do so again.

Bella excused herself from the Slytherins she had been sitting with and nodded to Snape as she walked past him, leaving the Great Hall after breakfast on the first day of classes. Snape nodded discretely, his typically sour expression unreadable.

Snape hadn't said a word about what had happened, and she knew he wouldn't. Modifying his memory would have been so much cleaner, but he was no doubt expecting it when he saw how clueless Andromeda and Narcissa were. Catching him unawares was near impossible – he was always on his guard because of the years of pranks from Potter and Sirius. She would simply have to trust him that he wouldn't betray her humiliation.

There were now only three others who remembered Bella's weakness: Voldemort, Snape, and Sirius. Soon there would be only two.

Bella wasn't intending to seek out Sirius. He would find her. She knew Sirius well enough to know that he couldn't rest well in the knowledge that she was having his child.

And he did seek her out.

As Bella walked through the Hogwarts hallways, adjusting the strap of her backpack on her shoulder, she glimpsed him out of the corner of her eye. He was trailing her, hanging back as the students passed them in the hallway. He must have abandoned his loud group of friends when he saw her leaving the Great Hall in order to speak with her.

Bella's mouth twitched as she forced back a smirk. Could Sirius have made it an easier for her to modify his memory?

The flow of students ebbed. When Sirius and Bella were alone in the hallway, he grabbed her arm.

"We have to talk," he whispered, pulling her into the nearest classroom.

Bella followed him, trying to look a surprised and curious.

When the door was locked behind them, Sirius released a deep breath and studied her. "Why have you been avoiding me, Bella?"

She blinked, genuinely startled at the accusation. "Avoiding you? How am I avoiding you? I'm here, aren't I?"

"Why haven't you replied to any of my owls?"

"Your owls? What owls?"

"The owls I've been sending you all Christmas break!"

"I haven't gotten any owls! You know I was at Grimmauld Place, right?"

Sirius raked his air in annoyance. "I tried both your manor and Grimmauld. Dammit, both our parents must have put up some spells to block any letters from me!"

"What's so blasted important that you had to send me owls where my family would see them?" she demanded.

He faltered. "I...I was trying to stop you from doing anything...stupid..."

She grinned. "Stupid, eh? Like what?"

"Like..." he scratched the back of his neck, "harming the..._baby."_

Bella giggled delightedly. "What in the world do you think would possess me to do that?"

"I dunno...I was kind of an ass about the whole thing..."

Bella's smile melted. "_'Kind_ of?'"

"Well, a major ass," he admitted. "I don't know, Bella...It's kinda weird to say it. It was easier to write..." His cheeks were red.

"What was?" she asked, taking great pleasure in watching him squirm even if she didn't know what he was getting at.

He locked eyes with her and stepped closer. "That I think we should go through with it."

"With _what_?"

"Having the baby—together. I mean, we do kinda have _something_ between us, you know? If we get married, it'd be hard at first, but eventually our family will get used to it..."

"You're asking me to marry you?" she clarified, eyes wide.

"Er—yeah." She could have transfigured him into a beet and he couldn't have looked any redder.

Bella chuckled gleefully. "This isn't the most romantic proposal I've ever heard, I'll have you know."

Sirius relaxed at her laugh. He cracked a smile. "Yeah, I know. But...you know...I think I might actually care for you, Bellatrix."

"You think so, mm?" she grinned, sauntering closer to him. He was making this too fun.

He smirked expectantly. "Yeah."

Bella put her hands his chest and slowly slid them behind his robe, down towards where his wand was tucked in the back of his belt. Sirius grinned as she pressed herself against him.

Her lips hovered over his as she whispered, "There's just one problem." Her fingers slid around his wand.

"And that is?" he came back flirtatiously.

Their lips brushed against each others', their breath intermingling.

Bella smiled and murmured, "There—is—no—baby."

It took Sirius a moment for that sentence to register. His faced morphed into shock; he gripped her shoulders and slowly, but firmly, pushed her away from him. Bella slipped his wand behind her back as she moved backwards.

"What do you mean, 'there's no baby?'" he asked in a hard voice.

"It's gone," she said coolly. "I took care of it...with a little help."

"Took care of it!"

"It's gone," she simpered. "Dead."

"You're lying. Even _you_ aren't capable of _murder!_"

Bella threw her head back, laughing manically. "I'm not capable of murder?" She lifted up her sweater to reveal the pink, puckering scar that ran down her abdomen.

Sirius stumbled back, his face pale.

"You see what lengths I went to to rid my body of your—your _vermin_?" she screeched.

He looked horrified, unable to peel his eyes from her marred stomach. "It wasn't vermin, it was your own son or daughter!"

"No spawn of yours would I ever call mine!"

"You're insane," he breathed, shaking his head. "_Insane_."

In a flash of anger, Bella dropped her top and pointed her wand at him.

Sirius jumped and reached for his wand. He fumbled around, searching for it.

"Looking for something, my love?" Bella giggled, pulling his wand from behind her back and twiddling it between her fingers.

Sirius froze.

"Scared, little Sirius?" she taunted, lifting both wands, one in each hand, at him.

He eyed her as if she was a dangerous animal. "How did I ever...?" His voice trailed off; he was incapable of continuing.

"Care for me?" she finished for him. "_Love_ me?"

"I never loved you!"

"Did too! I know what you said about me on the Hogwarts Express. Remember? When you modified my memory like I'm about to modify yours?"

Sirius just shook his head disbelievingly, eyes darting between the wands and her feral eyes.

She stepped closer, wands pointed at his chest. This was her moment of triumph; Sirius was defenseless. She could do what she wished with him. In moments, his memory would be wiped; he would have no remembrance of what he had done to her, how he had driven her to drastic measures to get rid of the abominable parasite.

Then suddenly she stopped. Sirius didn't move as she tilted her head to the side, studying him.

Did she _want _him to forget? Did she want him to have no idea of the history they shared? Did she want him going through life oblivious to the passion and pain they had inflicted upon the other?

Bella slowly lowered the wands.

"I was going to curse you to high hell, to make you forget this ever happened," she said, then gritted her teeth. "But I don't want you to forget. I want you to remember every little detail."

She raised the wands and advanced on him again. She stared up into his wide, grey eyes.

"I want you to remember every touch, every kiss. I want you to remember how you were such an ass that I risked my life to get rid of your spawn in my body. I want you to remember how your pride led to the death of your own son or daughter."

She paused just out of his reach. A wild giggle surged from her throat.

"I want you to always hate me," she cackled. "Because I may not be able to get away with killing you now, but I will someday. And I want you to want to kill me as much as I want to kill you."

He sneered at her. "Believe me, it'll be a pleasure to rid the world of you. You're a heartless bitch!"

"Getting brave are we?" she asked, jabbing the wands at his throat. "Don't forget who has the wands!"

Sirius made a quick grab for his wand, but she had been expecting it. She flicked the wands, and he was suddenly in the air, suspended by one foot. His robes hung upside down around him.

"Now, doesn't this look familiar?" she taunted shrilly. "It's exactly the same thing you did to Snape, the very person who helped me kill the baby. In fact, he did it himself, saving me the trouble. Fancy that!"

Sirius' face contorted with rage. He made a swipe at her, but she was out of his range.

"You'll pay for everything, you whore!" he growled.

"Oh, poor Sirius!" she mocked in a baby voice. "Hates big bad Bella so much, but can't do anything about it!" Her voice cooled. "You won't even have the courage to tell your friends anything about it. You'll never tell them that you cared for the devious Bellatrix Black, or that you almost had a baby with her. They'll never know. No one will."

She backed towards the door, not releasing the spell on him. Sparks shot out of the end of the wands. His eyes burned with fury.

Her back to the door, she swished the wand, making him drop to the floor in a heap. He righted himself and jumped to his feet.

She pointed the wands at him. "Ah, ah, ah!"

"You won't get away with taking my wand, Bella!" he snapped.

"Oh, I didn't take it," she simpered. "You lost it. A house elf will find it later in some remote part of the castle that you should have never been in. What a bad, bad boy, that Sirius Black!"

His lip curled with hate.

"Have a good first day of classes," she giggled, "without your wand."

She hesitated before leaving, her maniacal eyes staring across the room at the boy she had lusted for. Even loved.

He was nothing but a pathetic child, his robes and hair a mess. He had no idea of greatness, no ambition for glory.

He was nothing compared to Lord Voldemort.

And some day, she would have her revenge; but not this day. Not today.

But one day.

"Goodbye, Sirius."

She swept out of the classroom, shutting the door on him.

And like that, she closed the door on that chapter of her life, never to speak of it again.

But Sirius would always know what had happened. He would always hate her, and she him.

And she would _revel_ in the hatred.

The world would wonder at their animosity, but few would know its source.

All would know that Bellatrix and Sirius had a special hatred for each other, but none would know...exactly _why._


End file.
